At moment, there is an important debate about whether the use of smartphones, social media, and online games is beneficial in some way or negatively affects children’ education. Some people think that the modern technology has increased and improved the teaching methods; they state that children have much more information available than they had in the past. However, I personally believe that today teachers have more difficulties in educating children; I fell this way for two main reasons, which I will explain in the following essay.
Although nowadays children can access the broadest source of knowledge through smartphones, social media, and online games, often the quality of information gained from the internet is incomplete and superficial. In addition, the information is obtained instantly, and this has led children to be less patient and more distracted when there are at school. Currently, teachers are facing the problem of keeping their students focused for long period during their lessons. My own experience is a compelling example of this, when I was at primary school, my parents bought me a smartphone, soon after my math marks went down. My teacher, then, ask for a meeting with my parents because she noticed that I had difficulty in focusing during the class and the homework were full of distraction mistakes, so my parents decide to limit the use of smartphone only during the weekend, as results of this my marks improved a lot.
Furthermore, when children spend most of their time using smartphones, doing game online or using social networks, they tend to isolate and get tired easily. Primary school is the place where teachers educate children not only about the basic topic such as math history or geography, but they have help children to gain important social skills, such as working in a team, help each other and so on. When children spend most of their time using techs, they learn to stay more alone rather than spend time with friends, consequently, when they are at school have problems to create a relationship with their companions and teachers, this makes the teachers’ job of educating future generations harder than it was in the past.
In conclusion, I strongly believe that people involved in the educational field are facing more problems than past educators were, this is because techs have made children less patience, less focused, so teachers have more difficulties to keep their attention high for long period. The task of educating children nowadays is further made hard because children are always more isolated and tired because they spend most of their time alone and often they are up until late at night playing online games.
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- TPO-34 - Independent Writing Task Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Educating children is a more difficult task today than it was in the past because they spend so much time on cell phone, online games, and social networking Web site.U 73
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, furthermore, however, if, so, then, in addition, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 9.8082437276 20% => OK
Conjunction : 16.0 13.8261648746 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 43.0788530466 97% => OK
Preposition: 53.0 52.1666666667 102% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2268.0 1977.66487455 115% => OK
No of words: 442.0 407.700716846 108% => OK
Chars per words: 5.13122171946 4.8611393121 106% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.58517132086 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68548128834 2.67179642975 101% => OK
Unique words: 230.0 212.727598566 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.52036199095 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 693.0 618.680645161 112% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 20.6003584229 63% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 34.0 20.1344086022 169% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 62.0068711596 48.9658058833 127% => OK
Chars per sentence: 174.461538462 100.406767564 174% => OK
Words per sentence: 34.0 20.6045352989 165% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.92307692308 5.45110844103 127% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.5376344086 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 11.8709677419 51% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.85842293907 181% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 4.88709677419 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.260879642875 0.236089414692 111% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0978513898714 0.076458572812 128% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0692835461574 0.0737576698707 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.174744865737 0.150856017488 116% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0703051076857 0.0645574589148 109% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 19.7 11.7677419355 167% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.97 58.1214874552 64% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 16.6 10.1575268817 163% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.07 10.9000537634 120% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.9 8.01818996416 111% => OK
difficult_words: 100.0 86.8835125448 115% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 10.002688172 150% => OK
gunning_fog: 15.6 10.0537634409 155% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.