TPO- 54 Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
Funding of government on things that would benefit our countrymen are integral. Such funding can go a long way if it will be allocated properly in organization that needed it the most. In my opinion, government supporting the athletics would greatly benefit our young generation such as sponsoring the Olympic team in the Philippines. I feel this way for two main reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
First of all, sports here in the Philippines are not well funded by the government. Higher officials don't believe that sports have great positive effects on the overall well being of the players and the whole country. Many sports athletes are very talented but their talents and skills are not appreciated by the government. For example, Our Philippine team in weight lifting has a great athletes, she is really good but as she says in the interview in the local news our Philippine government did not shell out enough support for the weight lifting team. With regards to equipment, training facilities and financial support for the team. As a result, only one player shined in the Olympic event and she won Bronze medal. Right after her winning the Bronze medal, our president immediately responded to the plea of the athletes here in the Philippines. Winning in prestigious competition like in Olympics is a great honor and pride for our country. Hence, our athletes now can compete to the world without any fear of losing due to they are able to train with the utmost specialized trainer and equipment needed in order for them to succeed.
Secondly, funding for the arts are not that important compared to the giving support to the sports. As a matter of fact, many private companies are sponsoring many artists for their training and workshops for their crafts to be more useful, so, funding of the government is not really necessary. For instance, here in RCBC tower, every month the private companies have an art gallery exhibit for some artists and they help them to sell their paintings for the public. They allow the artists to use their venue for free as an art exhibit for the artists to showcase their talents and for the public to see their art. Many local artists are helped by this generous company and some of them are well know today as great painters in the Philippines. This illustrates that funding of the government is not needed by arts because many companies are willing to help them succeed in their careers.
To summarize, I strongly believed that the funds should be allocated in sports because only the government can help them to become the best athletes they can be and the government can benefit a lot if the Philippine team wins in foreign competitions.
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| 2020-01-11 | chou chun | 71 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 102, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...ded by the government. Higher officials dont believe that sports have great positive...
^^^^
Line 3, column 354, Rule ID: ADJECTIVE_IN_ATTRIBUTE[1]
Message: A more concise phrase may lose no meaning and sound more powerful.
Suggestion: team
...government. For example, Our Philippine team in weight lifting has a great athletes, she is re...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 389, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[2]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'athlete'?
Suggestion: athlete
...pine team in weight lifting has a great athletes, she is really good but as she says in ...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 698, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'known'.
Suggestion: known
...erous company and some of them are well know today as great painters in the Philippi...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, hence, if, really, second, secondly, so, well, for example, for instance, i feel, such as, as a matter of fact, as a result, first of all, in my opinion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 15.1003584229 126% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 9.8082437276 102% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 11.0286738351 63% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 43.0 43.0788530466 100% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 52.1666666667 105% => OK
Nominalization: 15.0 8.0752688172 186% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2249.0 1977.66487455 114% => OK
No of words: 464.0 407.700716846 114% => OK
Chars per words: 4.84698275862 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.64119157421 4.48103885553 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.59066336584 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 216.0 212.727598566 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.465517241379 0.524837075471 89% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 684.0 618.680645161 111% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 9.59856630824 83% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 3.51792114695 57% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 3.0 4.94265232975 61% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 20.6003584229 97% => OK
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 49.9053854809 48.9658058833 102% => OK
Chars per sentence: 112.45 100.406767564 112% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.2 20.6045352989 113% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.2 5.45110844103 150% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 11.8709677419 143% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.128150158939 0.236089414692 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0466713821328 0.076458572812 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0493229906651 0.0737576698707 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.086057295229 0.150856017488 57% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0293215197849 0.0645574589148 45% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.0 11.7677419355 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 56.59 58.1214874552 97% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 10.1575268817 109% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.15 10.9000537634 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.91 8.01818996416 99% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 86.8835125448 106% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.