You have enough money to purchase either a house or a business. Which one would you choose to buy? Give specific reasons to explain your support.
Believing that owning a shelter is more important than having a reliable source of income, some people invest their money in buying houses without hesitation rather than risking to use their money to establish a new business. I, however, think that putting one's money where it could be more productive is the better way to insure a more fruitful future.
The first reason to support my claim is that although investing in a new business or a start-up can be liability, in view of the fact that wrong investment or the fluctuations in economy can result in the failure of a venture and jeopardize the entire business, do we tread carefully in our planning, using the counsel of experienced and professional people in the business we want to embark on, we will be able to establish a sustainable enterprise which is far more productive than buying a house the price of which will likely remain the same through time.
Moreover, putting money to start a new business has other benefits including making new jobs for other people. This way not only do you use your money to run your own establishment, but also you employ others and provide them with a constant salary and an occupation to spend their time. This is of great importance especially in small towns and communities where the rate of unemployment is high and people, above all the young and the juvenile, are prone to turn to illegal activities such as robbery or get inflicted by addiction. Starting a new business can help alleviating such problems.
In the light of the aforementioned reasons, I strongly endorse the idea that making a new business, in spite of all its hardships, is the better investment in the way that it can multiply the original money and make new jobs for other people.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 258, Rule ID: ONES[1]
Message: Did you mean 'one's'?
Suggestion: one's
...usiness. I, however, think that putting ones money where it could be more productive...
^^^^
Line 5, column 568, Rule ID: ADVISE_VBG[5]
Message: The verb 'help' is used with infinitive: 'to alleviate' or 'alleviate'.
Suggestion: to alleviate; alleviate
...ction. Starting a new business can help alleviating such problems. In the light of the a...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, however, moreover, so, such as, in spite of
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 13.8261648746 87% => OK
Relative clauses : 10.0 11.0286738351 91% => OK
Pronoun: 25.0 43.0788530466 58% => OK
Preposition: 37.0 52.1666666667 71% => OK
Nominalization: 8.0 8.0752688172 99% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1460.0 1977.66487455 74% => OK
No of words: 305.0 407.700716846 75% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.7868852459 4.8611393121 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.17902490978 4.48103885553 93% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.73324265772 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 171.0 212.727598566 80% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.560655737705 0.524837075471 107% => OK
syllable_count: 465.3 618.680645161 75% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 9.59856630824 42% => OK
Article: 1.0 3.08781362007 32% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 8.0 20.6003584229 39% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 38.0 20.1344086022 189% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 143.450721068 48.9658058833 293% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 182.5 100.406767564 182% => OK
Words per sentence: 38.125 20.6045352989 185% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.625 5.45110844103 140% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 5.0 11.8709677419 42% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.88709677419 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.161126701432 0.236089414692 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.062200887914 0.076458572812 81% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0549657398238 0.0737576698707 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0886836177756 0.150856017488 59% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0308886885517 0.0645574589148 48% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 20.2 11.7677419355 172% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 41.37 58.1214874552 71% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 6.10430107527 183% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 16.9 10.1575268817 166% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.09 10.9000537634 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.2 8.01818996416 115% => OK
difficult_words: 71.0 86.8835125448 82% => More difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 18.0 10.002688172 180% => OK
gunning_fog: 17.2 10.0537634409 171% => OK
text_standard: 18.0 10.247311828 176% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.