TPO-46 - Integrated Writing Task In the United States, medical information about patients traditionally has been recorded and stored on paper forms. However, there are efforts to persuade doctors to adopt electronic medical record systems in which informa

The reading and the lecture are discussing the same topic. Whether to to keep the records in electronic forms or in the traditional paper records. The article advocate the the electronic system of records for three reasons, while the lecture casts doubts on these reasons mentioned in the reading.

To begin with, the reading states that using the electronic records reduces the costs. It saves a lot of spaces as well. The lecturer, on the other hand, refutes this claim by mentioning that doctors will still keep using the paper records even with the existence of the electronic records. The reasons for that is that doctors need to have paper copies for legal procedures if needed. As a result, there is no real saving in expenditure.

Second, the reading mentions that the electronic records can help to have more accurate records, which are free of errors, because it uses a standardization, which is opposite to the hand writhing method. The lectures, however, goes refutes this assumption by stating the doctors usually writ their notes in hand writing at first, then one of the staff would enter these data into the computer. Therefore, if these data contain errors, the staff would not be able to recognize these errors or correct them.

Third, the article thinks that the electronic records would help to preform research easily because of the available organized amount of data. However, the lecturer rebut this belief by stating that there is a privacy policy which is applied in the Untied States, which prevents any one form using these data without the permission of the patient.

Votes
Average: 8 (1 vote)
Essay Categories
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 68, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: to
... are discussing the same topic. Whether to to keep the records in electronic forms or...
^^^^^
Line 1, column 160, Rule ID: MASS_AGREEMENT[2]
Message: Possible agreement error - use third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: 'advocates'.
Suggestion: advocates
... traditional paper records. The article advocate the the electronic system of records fo...
^^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 169, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a word
Suggestion: the
...nal paper records. The article advocate the the electronic system of records for three ...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 169, Rule ID: DT_DT[1]
Message: Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only 'the' or 'the' is left.
Suggestion: the; the
...nal paper records. The article advocate the the electronic system of records for three ...
^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 280, Rule ID: ANY_BODY[1]
Message: Did you mean 'anyone'?
Suggestion: anyone
...ed in the Untied States, which prevents any one form using these data without the permi...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, however, if, second, so, still, then, therefore, third, well, while, as a result, to begin with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 8.0 10.4613686534 76% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 5.04856512141 119% => OK
Conjunction : 3.0 7.30242825607 41% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 11.0 12.0772626932 91% => OK
Pronoun: 19.0 22.412803532 85% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 30.3222958057 109% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 5.01324503311 60% => More nominalization wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1339.0 1373.03311258 98% => OK
No of words: 267.0 270.72406181 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.01498127341 5.08290768461 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.04229324003 4.04702891845 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.47051941359 2.5805825403 96% => OK
Unique words: 145.0 145.348785872 100% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.543071161049 0.540411800872 100% => OK
syllable_count: 413.1 419.366225166 99% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.55342163355 97% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 3.25607064018 31% => OK
Interrogative: 0.0 0.116997792494 0% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.23620309051 121% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 1.25165562914 320% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 1.51434878587 0% => OK
Preposition: 2.0 2.5761589404 78% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 13.0662251656 99% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 21.2450331126 94% => OK
Sentence length SD: 56.6155936451 49.2860985944 115% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.0 110.228320801 93% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.5384615385 21.698381199 95% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.69230769231 7.06452816374 137% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.09492273731 98% => OK
Language errors: 5.0 4.19205298013 119% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 4.33554083885 161% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 4.45695364238 67% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.27373068433 70% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.374279642227 0.272083759551 138% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.134250367921 0.0996497079465 135% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.103303574748 0.0662205650399 156% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.23541547463 0.162205337803 145% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0467000634947 0.0443174109184 105% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.4 13.3589403974 93% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 59.64 53.8541721854 111% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 11.0289183223 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.78 12.2367328918 96% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.89 8.42419426049 106% => OK
difficult_words: 72.0 63.6247240618 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.7273730684 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.498013245 95% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 11.2008830022 89% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 80.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.