The charts below show the results of a survey of adult education. The first chart shows the reasons why adults decide to study. The pie chart shows how people think the costs of adult education should be shared.Summarise the information by selecting and r

Essay topics:

The charts below show the results of a survey of adult education. The first chart shows the reasons why adults decide to study. The pie chart shows how people think the costs of adult education should be shared.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

As you can see there are two charts describing the outcome of a survery about the adult education. The bar chart reveals that why people decide to study. On the other hand, pie chart illustrates that why people think that expenditures of adult education should be shared. Both chats will be analysed in proper detail in the following sections.

Adult people decide to study due to various causes.According to the bar chart people choose to study beacuse they are interested in a subject, which holds 40 percent in the chart. The reason behind this is because recruitment market is becoming more competitive and people tend to increase their knowledge and skills in order to improve their employability.

Therefore, reasons for adults to study are to gain high qualifications, to be helpful for current job, to change job which constitutes 38,22,20 and 12 percent of the bar chart respectively. These proportions have been increasing recently. The least popular and less important reason for adult to study is to be able to meet people, which constitutes only 9 percent in the chart.

Educational expenditure are another significant factors which are affecting adults study decision. People have different suggestion and opinions about how tuition fees should be shared.Mostly 40 percent of adults think that study expenditures should be paid by themselves. However on the other hand, 35 percent of people consider that costs should be paid by recruiter or employer as most education for adult is job related. Approximately 25 percent of people think that expenses should be shared by taxpayers.

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Comments

Educational expenditure are another significant factors
Educational expenditures are other significant factors

People have different suggestion and opinions
People have different suggestions and opinions

However on the other hand,
'On the other hand' means 'However'. It doesn't mean 'On another hand'.

Sentence: Educational expenditure are another significant factors which are affecting adults study decision.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, singular, common
Suggestion: Refer to adults and study

Sentence: As you can see there are two charts describing the outcome of a survery about the adult education.
Error: survery Suggestion: survey

Sentence: Adult people decide to study due to various causes.According to the bar chart people choose to study beacuse they are interested in a subject, which holds 40 percent in the chart.
Error: beacuse Suggestion: because

Sentence: The reason behind this is because recruitment market is becoming more competitive and people tend to increase their knowledge and skills in order to improve their employability.
Error: employability Suggestion: No alternate word

flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2

Don't need to make comments in IELTS task I like:
The reason behind this is because recruitment market is becoming more competitive and people tend to increase their knowledge and skills in order to improve their employability.

Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 13 10
No. of Words: 260 200
No. of Characters: 1312 1000
No. of Different Words: 141 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.016 4.0
Average Word Length: 5.046 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.717 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 100 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 66 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 43 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 32 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.44 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.231 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.385 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.592 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.086 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4