TPO 23
According to the information presented in the reading passage, it can be clearly understood that the experts suppose that three different factors may cause the population problems of yellow cedar. However, considering the points stated in the listening passage, the lecturer is of the opinion that three main points that mentioned as a declining factors of yellow cedar are not really true.
As for the facts mentioned in the reading passage, the author is persuaded that flyblow is the main reason for this happened, because these species are use the cedar tree as a food. On the other hand, the professor points out that due to chemical poison which produced by tree, these flyblow couldn't penetrate to the skin of trees. Another point made by the professor is despite that the bears are eat the woods of yellow cedar as a part of regime, they can't be a reason for demolition of yellow cedars. As the number of trees in iland, thereon bears unseen, the rate of decreasing was more than Mainland with having bears. While, the reading passage indicates that this tree is valuable food in bear’s diet, so they are the main reason for this declining.
The speaker convinced that freezing of the root in not correct reason, because the rate of declining in warmer area were more than colder area. While, the reading implies that climate change which caused to decrease the temperature and consequences the freezing root is the main reason for yellow cedar population problem. Based on the facts mentioned in the reading and listening passage, it can be concluded that there are some reasons for abatement of yellow cedar crowd, as each reasons have some counterexample which makes the reason unacceptable.
- TPO 13 70
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?Teachers should not make their social or political views known to the students in the class room 60
- Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support. 80
- TPO 22 60
- TPO 23 60
Sentence: The speaker convinced that freezing of the root in not correct reason, because the rate of declining in warmer area were more than colder area.
Description: The token in is not usually followed by a negator
Suggestion: Refer to in and not
Sentence: Based on the facts mentioned in the reading and listening passage, it can be concluded that there are some reasons for abatement of yellow cedar crowd, as each reasons have some counterexample which makes the reason unacceptable.
Description: A determiner/pronoun, singular is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to each and reasons
flaws:
The correct pattern:
para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3
Don't need to reiterate the contents of reading passages a lot but put more content from the lecture.
Don't need a conclusion paragraph.
Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 19 in 30
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 10 12
No. of Words: 288 250
No. of Characters: 1390 1200
No. of Different Words: 137 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.12 4.2
Average Word Length: 4.826 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.445 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 103 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 72 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 40 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 30 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.8 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 4.792 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.6 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.422 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.591 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.09 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 4