You are writing a letter in response to an advertisement offering a work to look after a house in Scotland.
In your letter write: about your self , who you are.
Why do you need this job?
Any questions with regard to this job.
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing this letter in response to your ads of 21st January on the internet. And, I have been here for two years. I am a junior student at the Scotland University . I am an Egyptian girl.
As I am a girl and always help my mom, I really have a great experience of home chores. So, I found myself applied to this job. Actually I need this job to help me afford my tuitions expenses. And, we are now on the summer holiday. Thus, I can work full-time and safe some money.
I have just needed some inquiries about this job such as: How many family members in the house , are there any children and the ages of these children? Also, how many hours would I work per a week? And when would be the holidays?
However, you can contact me any time on my cell phone; ( 055 555 6661) , or you may send me an email at Heba@hotmail.com. Whatever your reply, I will appreciate it . I look forward to hearing from you soon.
Yours sincerely,
Heba
Miss Heba Ahmed
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Sentence: Thus, I can work full-time and safe some money.
Description: An adjective is not usually followed by a determiner/pronoun, singular or plural
Suggestion: Refer to safe and some
Sentence: Actually I need this job to help me afford my tuitions expenses.
Description: A noun, plural, common is not usually followed by a noun, plural, common
Suggestion: Refer to tuitions and expenses
flaws:
More compound or complex sentences wanted.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.5 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 15 10
No. of Words: 177 200
No. of Characters: 700 1000
No. of Different Words: 116 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.647 4.0
Average Word Length: 3.955 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.206 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 37 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 27 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 17 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 6 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 11.8 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.635 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.533 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.372 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.564 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.163 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4