In many countries, the proportion of older people is increasing steadily. Do you think its is a positive or negative change to the society.
From the evidences of both rich and poor countries, the trends toward fewer children and more senior inhabitants are proceeding at an accelerated pace. Some people say that longer life expectancy of human means that they are having better living standards and it is a possitive tendency, however others claim that it would cause some serious problems to the community. From my point of view, i am of mixed opinion on this.
First of all, it is believed that the ageing of a socitey leads to a shrinking workforce as well as a lack of wealth available to sustain the retired population. Only when the senior residents make up a fractional percentage of the population is a society able to give them the retirement pension or allowance. For example, a certain amount of state budget need to be poured into the construction of well-equipped nursing house due to the fact that the worsing health of the elderly. In addition to this, numerous organisations will find it harder to recruit from their pool of school-leavers and post-graduate students.
However, we should never overlook the other side of the coin is that the old generations have a wealth of experience and specialised knowledge which could make them as a major source of expert personnel. A worker with decades - long working lives, for instance, could be seen as an admirable mentor for young workforce of a company for his safcifice and faithfulness. Equally importantly, considering the old people have paid taxes for along time thus no one should be excluded from any service, especially the health care system.
In conclusion, although higher rate of old people has its own validity, I firmly hold the view that the shortcomings should not be overlooked. Hence, the governments should pay further attention to this contentious issue for the sake of the whole society.
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Sentence: The key to this problem must lie in the regulations made by authorities which governing the behaviour of both businesses and citizens.
Description: A WH-determiner is not usually followed by a verb, present participle or gerund
Suggestion: Refer to which and governing
Sentence: Urgent solutions should be taken into consideration, however this process require the strick rules from governments as well as the cooperation of each individual and business.
Description: The fragment process require the is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace require with verb, past tense
Sentence: Manufactoring and household have been discharging tons of gabage annually.
Error: gabage Suggestion: garbage
Sentence: This phenomenon grabed a headline in envirionmental issue and the treatment of waste continues to be a global problem.
Error: envirionmental Suggestion: environmental
Error: grabed Suggestion: ?
Sentence: To begin with, it is an indisputable fact that the accrual of gabage is a inevitable result of the social and economic development. some immoral coporations, for example, are the main contributors to undustrial waste, including chemicals, plastic as well as non-recyclable materials.
Error: gabage Suggestion: garbage
Error: coporations Suggestion: corporations
Error: undustrial Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: In addition to this, being not conscious of the importance of reusing and recycling waste, a variety of individuals dispose of rubishs whenever they consider convenient.
Error: rubishs Suggestion: rubbish
Sentence: Not only should it be imposed in a national level but also the worldwide scope to minimise waste's genertaion.
Error: minimise Suggestion: minimize
Error: genertaion Suggestion: generation
Sentence: Additionaly, global community should support some specific nations to achieve remarkable progress in the field of reducing gabage, by sharing experience in envirionmental management, countries can tackle problems with greater efficiency at lower cost.
Error: envirionmental Suggestion: environmental
Error: gabage Suggestion: garbage
Sentence: By way of conclusion, the trends toward ever-incresing demand for manufactured goods are proceeding at an accelarated pace.
Error: accelarated Suggestion: accelerated
Sentence: Urgent solutions should be taken into consideration, however this process require the strick rules from governments as well as the cooperation of each individual and business.
Error: strick Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 13 2
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.033 0.07
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 4 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 13 2
No. of Sentences: 13 15
No. of Words: 291 350
No. of Characters: 1589 1500
No. of Different Words: 192 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.13 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.46 4.6
Word Length SD: 3.18 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 127 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 102 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 78 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 60 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 22.385 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.353 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.385 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.298 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.553 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.033 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5