Succeccful sports professionals can earn a great deal money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair
Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
In the swift development of the modern world today, there has been a growing concern about the justify of income for sport professional. Some people says that a sport professionals, for instance, an athletes can obtain high salary, while the other argue that they are not qualified for a great income.
An athlete deserves high salary due to the fact that they have a great skill and talent. It can be realized that with spesific and great ability deserve a highest income. For example, Gareth bale, a football player, has been transfered from totenham hotspur to real madrid with an expensive budget. Real madrid can give high salary to gareth bale because he is a top scorer from totenham. He can make many goals in the previous seasons. The other reason are they had to switch the time of formal study in early age with a practice and focus on their skill. For example, the gold medalist mix double badminton team of indonesia, Liliana natsir, just finished her study until elementary school, after that she just focus & practice to become the great badminton player.
However, several people agree that an athlete does not earn a significant salary. They think an athlete does not have a contribution to society, while teacher does. Teacher always give their knowledge to student, while an athlete just obtain the salary for theirself.
All in all, in my opinion, an athlete are deserve obtain a great income, because that is the appretiation for their effort. They had been practice all the time in their early age. They spent much time to become a great athlete
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- Succeccful sports professionals can earn a great deal money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfairDiscuss both these views and give your opinion. 60
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Sentence: In the swift development of the modern world today, there has been a growing concern about the justify of income for sport professional.
Description: The token the is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to the and justify
Sentence: Some people says that a sport professionals, for instance, an athletes can obtain high salary, while the other argue that they are not qualified for a great income.
Description: The fragment people says that is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace says with verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Sentence: All in all, in my opinion, an athlete are deserve obtain a great income, because that is the appretiation for their effort.
Description: The fragment , an athlete is not usually followed by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
Description: The fragment deserve obtain a is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace obtain with verb, past tense
Teacher always give their knowledge to student, while an athlete just obtain the salary for theirself.
Teacher always gives their knowledge to student, while an athlete just obtains the salary for theirself.
Sentence: It can be realized that with spesific and great ability deserve a highest income.
Error: spesific Suggestion: specific
Sentence: For example, Gareth bale, a football player, has been transfered from totenham hotspur to real madrid with an expensive budget.
Error: transfered Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Real madrid can give high salary to gareth bale because he is a top scorer from totenham.
Error: gareth Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: Teacher always give their knowledge to student, while an athlete just obtain the salary for theirself.
Error: theirself Suggestion: ?
Sentence: All in all, in my opinion, an athlete are deserve obtain a great income, because that is the appretiation for their effort.
Error: appretiation Suggestion: appreciation
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 56 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 29 40
Read a good grammar book.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 5 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 269 350
No. of Characters: 1263 1500
No. of Different Words: 142 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.05 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.695 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.294 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 90 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 56 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 29 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 15 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.933 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.588 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.467 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.345 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.554 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.161 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5