(work with mistakes)
Some people think that sport teaches children how to compete, while others believe that children learn team work.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some aver that sport develops in progeny a desire to compete. At the same time, there are those who state that offspring are taught how to be team players. Below both prospects will be discussed in details and author’s opinion will be stated.
On the one hand, sport embodies the idea of competition itself. In fact, almost all sports events are aimed to figure out who is the fastest, the strongest or the best at a particular activity, for instance, success of any country that takes part in Olympic Games is measured by a number of trophies and medals its athletes have won. Consequently, seeking victory is the main goal of sport that encourages children to rival each other.
On the other hand, some state that taking part in sports activities teaches how to be a part of a team. In fact, there are many games such as football and baseball where groups of players compete with one another. Perhaps those players indeed learn how to cooperate but there is still a competition not only among teams but also among members of each teams as well because only the best of them will play and those who are less gifted, talented or competitive will spend their time on the bench. Moreover, closer look at any individualistic sport would reveal that there is almost no place for team effort. For instance, such kind of athletics as running assumes that there is only one champion and this implies that even members of the same athletic team are seeking the same prize. Thus, there is little room for working together. Therefore, although children could learn how to work in a team, this skill seems to have only secondary importance.
In my opinion, children who participate in variety of sport activities are mainly taught how to protect their interests and how to achieve success, in other words, youngsters learn how to compete, and they are also told that sometimes in order to be first they need cooperate with others and this team work allows them to become the best. Thus, an understanding that competition and rivalry is essential for achieving success is acquired by children from taking part in sport.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2017-09-02 | EugeneDubinchuk | 44 | view |
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Comments
Essay evaluation report
flaws:
wrong structure.
The third paragraph is talking about the same thing like in the second paragraph. It should be about the advantages of team work only.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 5.0 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 366 350
No. of Characters: 1704 1500
No. of Different Words: 185 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.374 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.656 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.384 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 108 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 82 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 49 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 27 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.4 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 15.327 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.733 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.322 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.512 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.067 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, consequently, first, if, look, moreover, second, so, still, therefore, thus, well, for instance, in fact, kind of, such as, in my opinion, in other words, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 13.1623246493 167% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 7.85571142285 89% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 10.4138276553 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 7.30460921844 205% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 25.0 24.0651302605 104% => OK
Preposition: 52.0 41.998997996 124% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.3376753507 72% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1758.0 1615.20841683 109% => OK
No of words: 366.0 315.596192385 116% => OK
Chars per words: 4.80327868852 5.12529762239 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.37391431897 4.20363070211 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.48920749657 2.80592935109 89% => OK
Unique words: 190.0 176.041082164 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.51912568306 0.561755894193 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 541.8 506.74238477 107% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 5.43587174349 18% => OK
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.10420841683 48% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 0.809619238477 124% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.76152304609 168% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 16.0721442886 93% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.2975951904 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 84.7149468643 49.4020404114 171% => OK
Chars per sentence: 117.2 106.682146367 110% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.4 20.7667163134 117% => OK
Discourse Markers: 12.2 7.06120827912 173% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.01903807615 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 3.4128256513 88% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.282348542169 0.244688304435 115% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0944592828528 0.084324248473 112% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.070614161578 0.0667982634062 106% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.170173496281 0.151304729494 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0650864289771 0.056905535591 114% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 13.0946893788 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 50.2224549098 111% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 11.3001002004 102% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.86 12.4159519038 87% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.15 8.58950901804 95% => OK
difficult_words: 77.0 78.4519038076 98% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 9.78957915832 112% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.1190380762 115% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 73.0337078652 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.