Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents or other adult relatives should make important decisions for their older (15 to 18 year-old) teenage children. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.
My brother one day looked at my father at age 18 and asked him to propose our neighbor’s family for their girl. After a while, maybe one or two months after their marriage, a terrible fight ignited between them caused to their separation! This story is so common among teenage children who want to yield big responsibilities too soon. Why, should have they prevented from taking too much risk? In my opinion, in these ages children have not enough perspective about important decisions due to not forming their imagination about the future realistically and not experiencing responsibilities.
To begin with, not making decision’s most significant reason is not having enough perspective about future. They have not adequate knowledge about even themselves, let alone familiarized with their futures. Inexperienced stand as if they know everything while they do not know anything. They should spend long life till identify with their interests, talents, and goals. For example, a person without having convincing goal how can take important decision like marriage. He/she at the first step should provide rudimentary like a good job for supporting their family, a good perspective like being Prof. at the university, and also a trust for being a trustable person to account for. No wonder, after all these they will become prepared for accepting responsibilities.
Additionally, becoming trustable person requires several steps in which priorities should maintain. For example, a boy for becoming a man needs to attract trust of other memberships. Several measurements can help like waking up soon and go for work as soon as it’s possible, taking various responsibilities, for an instance, taking care of siblings, and repairing broken furniture in house. All would be practical, if they want to show themselves like a man.
All in all, to put the issue into a nut shell, I contended that teenage children are not eligible for taking important decisions. If parents want release their children to society sooner than others, they should learn them how they should behave. Isn’t that what you think, right?
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My brother one day looked at my father at age 18 and asked him to propose our neighbor’s family for their girl.
Suggestion: Can you re-write this sentence?
a terrible fight ignited between them caused to their separation!
a terrible fight ignited between them which caused their separation!
should have they prevented from taking too much risk?
should they have prevented from taking too much risk?
not making decision’s most significant reason is not having enough perspective about future.
Suggestion: Can you re-write this sentence?
a person without having convincing goal how can take important decision like marriage.
how can a person without having convincing goal take an important decision like marriage?
like waking up soon and go for work
like waking up soon and going for work
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
Still have grammatical issues.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 340 350
No. of Characters: 1721 1500
No. of Different Words: 210 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.294 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.062 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.839 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 119 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 84 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 62 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 42 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.895 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.779 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.579 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.271 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.458 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.085 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5