Television advertising directed towards young children (aged two to five) should not be allowed. Agree/disagree
In this highly competitive world, companies, by their very nature, are in a constant struggle to present their products to people, in an intriguing way, making them their potential customers. In this vein, some people are of the opinion that advertisements for children have to be forbidden, whereas, others believe otherwise. Personally, I have a penchant for banning advertising towards kids. The chief reasons to substantiate my viewpoint are elaborated upon hereunder.
First and foremost, advertising directed towards children is prone to have detrimental effects on their health. To illustrate, kids, in ages from two to five, are in the special stage of the cognitive learning ability which they are not sufficiently competent to make reasonable and rational decisions when it comes to crucial matters. To illustrate, they are not able to think about abstract ideas and will perceive only things that they directly see or touch. Accordingly, they cannot understand the following ramifications of their decisions. Furthermore, the first priority of all companies is to gain the maximum profit from selling their product, without considering any probable hazards that they could generate for their costumers particularly children. My personal experience is a convincing example in this regard. When I was a child, because I found all of the fancy colorful advertisements about food appealing, I always used to force my parents to buy me very sweet foods such as ice cream. As a result, it turned into a harmful habit for me which continued to my older ages contributing to putting me on the verge of diabetes. Had I not been exposed to misleading commercials, my health would not be in danger now.
Second, so far-reaching is the pernicious impact of child-directed commercials on the condition of the rest of the family especially parents that one cannot afford to treat it lightly. In this case, Poverty-stricken families are the most susceptible ones. Self-evidently, children from two to five have an overwhelming desire to want everything they find aesthetically attractive. If a parent fails to fulfill their children's wishes repeatedly, they will feel embarrassed and upset, which is a recipe for consequent depression and tragedies. Take the example of my neighbor as a clear illustration. They were from a very poor family and had a hard time surviving the vicissitudes of life. The father of the family always felt ashamed due to not affording to provide for his family. When his little son saw a bicycle advertisement, he wanted his father to purchase one for him. Owing to the inability of the father to provide his son's wishes and the cumulative effects of poverty, he decided to commit suicide. Unequivocally, advertising played a part in this tragedy.
To recapitulate, with all this taken into account, I have a dominant conviction that TV commercials directed into children must be banned, on the grounds that these commercials not only contribute to deteriorating kids' health condition but adversely affecting poor families as well.
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 862, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...rd. When I was a child, because I found all of the fancy colorful advertisements about foo...
^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
accordingly, but, first, furthermore, if, second, so, well, whereas, such as, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 18.0 15.1003584229 119% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 9.8082437276 71% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 13.8261648746 65% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.0286738351 109% => OK
Pronoun: 55.0 43.0788530466 128% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 71.0 52.1666666667 136% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.0752688172 74% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2577.0 1977.66487455 130% => OK
No of words: 490.0 407.700716846 120% => OK
Chars per words: 5.25918367347 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.70488508055 4.48103885553 105% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.14900075383 2.67179642975 118% => OK
Unique words: 277.0 212.727598566 130% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.565306122449 0.524837075471 108% => OK
syllable_count: 810.0 618.680645161 131% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.51630824373 112% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 3.0 3.08781362007 97% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 13.0 4.94265232975 263% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 24.0 20.6003584229 117% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 20.1344086022 99% => OK
Sentence length SD: 58.8918352905 48.9658058833 120% => OK
Chars per sentence: 107.375 100.406767564 107% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.4166666667 20.6045352989 99% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.70833333333 5.45110844103 68% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.5376344086 18% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 11.8709677419 59% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 9.0 3.85842293907 233% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 8.0 4.88709677419 164% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.149563743515 0.236089414692 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0404580558925 0.076458572812 53% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0487990237252 0.0737576698707 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.090566704235 0.150856017488 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0256427230823 0.0645574589148 40% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.6 11.7677419355 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 42.72 58.1214874552 74% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.23 10.9000537634 121% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.11 8.01818996416 114% => OK
difficult_words: 139.0 86.8835125448 160% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 10.002688172 85% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 10.0537634409 99% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.247311828 88% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 90.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 27.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.