"We are spending too much on free customer service after a sale has been made; we need to limit our warranty to two years in order to improve our profit margins. The current lifetime warranty can lead to costs decades into a product's life cycle. Also, we pay our customer service employees a premium because they must possess expert skills across the entirety of our very diverse product line, including products we no longer sell."
The author of the memo has come to the conclusion that to increase the companies profit margin that the company has to stop providing free life time warranty and limit the warranty to two years. The author has made an argument that is not very well thought out and depends on several assumptions while not taking into account the circumstances that may actually hurt the company's profit. If these issues were resolved and further evidence was presented, the argument may be strengthened.
The first flaw in the authors argument is that the authour assumes that potential customers are not persuade...
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Comments
Thanks for the grade . I have
Thanks for the grade . I have mild dyslexia and very bad spelling . I initially thought my spelling would drop my Mark by a lot more. How much does spelling and grammar have an effect on my final score and is there anything I could have done to make my score a 6
The essay can get 5.5 without
The essay can get 5.5 without spelling errors. It is moderate to give 5.0 out of 6.0. It should be less than 5.0 by those spelling errors.
If you could develop same essay in real exam without spelling errors, you may get 6.0 we believe. The reason is that it is hard to put 518 words in half an hour for an argument essay, and the arguments are great in this essay.
Sentence: The first flaw in the authors argument is that the authour assumes that potential customers are not persuaded to purchase from the company because of the free life time warranty.
Error: authour Suggestion: author
Sentence: Manufacturing and industrial equipment can be quite costly and a life time warranty may enourage a customer to make a purchase.
Error: enourage Suggestion: encourage
Sentence: To find out how much a life time warranty is a factor in a customers purchase the company could use market research tools to poll customers and get a better picture of the influnce a life time warranty has on a customers purchase.
Error: influnce Suggestion: influence
Sentence: If the equipment is likely to expereince a manufacturing fault every 50 years and the cost to repair the fault is low, it would hurt the authors argument.
Error: expereince Suggestion: experience
Sentence: Finally the author has wrongly assumed that the premium paid to staff for their expert knowlgde is not warranted.
Error: knowlgde Suggestion: knowledge
Sentence: While this may cut into profit margins,the staff's expert knowlgde may actually help sales and the way customers percive the company.
Error: percive Suggestion: perceive
Error: knowlgde Suggestion: knowledge
Sentence: If customers enquire about issues that are not specifically related to the products warranty, the staff will be better equiped to provide a much better service and provide the information they need.
Error: equiped Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: This expert knowlegde during customer services will help with the company's reputation and give customers the confidence to continue making purchases from the company.
Error: knowlegde Suggestion: knowledge
Sentence: If data regarding the cost of the life time warranty is included, how often people use the warranty, how much the company pays staff for their expert knowlegde and how much customers value the life time warranty then the authour could better evaluate and strenghthen his or her argument.
Error: authour Suggestion: author
Error: strenghthen Suggestion: strengthen
Error: knowlegde Suggestion: knowledge
flaws:
No. of Spelling Errors: 12 2
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.0 out of 6
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 12 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 518 350
No. of Characters: 2489 1500
No. of Different Words: 199 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.771 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.805 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.52 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 182 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 146 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 100 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 51 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 30.471 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.672 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.824 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.392 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.61 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.133 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5