Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams
When it comes to the argument of whether governments should support the arts or athletics, it has been long discussed. I believe governments should spend more money on athletics. I feel this way for two reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.
To begin with, governments can gain reputation by sporting athletics. In the modern-day, sports have already been an important part of our daily lives. There are lots of different sports events such as NBA or MLB and Olympics. If the athletics who have been funded by their country's government, have done great jobs during the game, it will not only brings honors to the country but also gain a reputation for the government. For instance, two years ago, our country's government had started a project to sponsor the Olympic athletics. The government provides a monthly salary and lots of expensive equipment for them to train. Because of the support from the government, every athletics has been well trained and maintains an excellent physical condition. As a result, they win a lot of gold metals at the Olympics and bring honor to the country. Moreover, the fans of athletics including athletics itself vote for the government in the next election because of the funding for sports.
In addition, facilities for training athletics are more expensive than the arts. Doing art usually just needs some easy and cheap working tools such as a pen or painting board. However, training athletics needs a lot of costly equipment and even requires hiring a coach. Therefore, athletics are more needed to obtain help from governments. I am a compelling example of this idea. I like to play basketball and I am recently joining in the city's basketball team. In order to win the game, we need to practice every day after work and there are a variety of costs we need to spend on training, including renting a basketball field, hiring training coach and health insurance just in case we have injured during the games. However, our government has supported us by paying the salary for the coach and supplying extra equipment for practice so we do not need to worry about the cost of training. If the government does not offer money, we might not able to pay for such a large number of expenses.
In conclusion, I strongly believe instead of supporting the arts, governments should sponsor athletics. This is because governments can gain reputation and athletics are more needed to be supported
- TPO53 Integrated Writing Task 76
- The rules that societies today expect young people to follow and obey are too strict 85
- Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state sponsored Olympic teams 70
- It is more important for governments to spend money to improve Internet access than to improve public 70
- The opinions of celebrities such as famous entertainers and athletes are more important to younger people than they are to older people 70
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 350, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[3]
Message: The verb 'will' requires base form of the verb: 'bring'
Suggestion: bring
... jobs during the game, it will not only brings honors to the country but also gain a r...
^^^^^^
Line 3, column 969, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...oney, we might not able to pay for such a large number of expenses. In conclusion, I strongly be...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, however, if, moreover, so, therefore, well, for instance, i feel, in addition, in conclusion, such as, as a result, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 15.1003584229 73% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 9.8082437276 112% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 3.0 11.0286738351 27% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 26.0 43.0788530466 60% => OK
Preposition: 51.0 52.1666666667 98% => OK
Nominalization: 20.0 8.0752688172 248% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2032.0 1977.66487455 103% => OK
No of words: 414.0 407.700716846 102% => OK
Chars per words: 4.90821256039 4.8611393121 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.51076378781 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.72707346496 2.67179642975 102% => OK
Unique words: 216.0 212.727598566 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.521739130435 0.524837075471 99% => OK
syllable_count: 616.5 618.680645161 100% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 13.0 9.59856630824 135% => OK
Article: 2.0 3.08781362007 65% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.86738351254 0% => OK
Preposition: 6.0 4.94265232975 121% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.3598619269 48.9658058833 97% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.347826087 100.406767564 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.0 20.6045352989 87% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.08695652174 5.45110844103 112% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 11.8709677419 126% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.88709677419 143% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.312056607853 0.236089414692 132% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0915681509793 0.076458572812 120% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0835462006325 0.0737576698707 113% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.225505155592 0.150856017488 149% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0754671396332 0.0645574589148 117% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.7 11.7677419355 91% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.9 10.9000537634 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.69 8.01818996416 96% => OK
difficult_words: 83.0 86.8835125448 96% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.0 10.002688172 60% => Linsear_write_formula is low.
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.