“The Smith Corporation should not be permitted to develop the land that is now part of the Youngtown Wildlife Preserve. This sanctuary is essential to the survival of the 300 bird species that live in our area. Although only a small percentage of the land will be sold to Smith, the proposed development will have disastrous consequences for our area. The company plans to build a small hotel on the land. Although they have promised to ensure the preservation of the sanctuary, there is no way that their plans will do anything but harm the sanctuary. There are no circumstances under which this sale will benefit our community, which relies on tourists who visit.”
Argument Analysis.
Graded on 1-6 scale.
Any suggestions and score evaluations would be appreciated
According to the members of an environmental protection group, there are no circumstances under which the sale of a small part of the land of Youngtown Wildlife Preserve will benefit the community. Hence, they strongly suggest that this sale to The Smith Corporation for the development of the land should not be permitted. While the author’s assertions could be true, he should provide adequate answers to the following three questions in order to increase the persuasiveness of his suggestion.
Firstly, the members of the environmental protection group state that 300 bird species live in our area. However, he fails to mention the source of this information which could be apocryphal, and hence the credibility of this statement comes into question. Perhaps, the source of this survey was an amateur bird-watcher who thought he had seen 300 different species in the area. There is a very high possibility that the number of species native to this area is very less compared to the given number and that the rest are just migratory birds who come and go as and when it suits them. This leads to a possibility of another scenario that the number of bird species stated in the extract could be the different number of species seen throughout the entire year and only a very few species of birds are present in the sanctuary at a particular given time. If any of the above-stated scenarios are true, the group’s statement could be seriously weakened.
The group asserts that even though only a small percentage of land is being bought by The Smith Corporation, it would have disastrous consequences on their area. However, the group does not provide any supporting material or facts that lead them to this conclusion. It is highly plausible that the part of the land they are acquiring is not home to any of the bird species. Another possibility could be that this land could be a barren land without any trees and might not even be important to the sanctuary. In addition, there is a good chance that this part of the land might be affecting the overall beauty of the sanctuary. The extract mentions that The Smith corporation promises the preservation of the sanctuary however the group does not trust their promise. However, there is no proof that the corporation has previously failed to fulfill its promises. There is a high probability that they have previously been under similar circumstances and have actually preserved the environment. The group is required to shed more light on these concerns in order to make his suggestion more compelling.
Finally, an argument that would decrease the credibility of this argument is the assumption that the number of tourists would be adversely affected by the building of a hotel. The basis of the group’s statement relies on the assumption that the building of a hotel would affect the bird’s population which in turn leads to a decrease in the number of tourists. However, there is no guarantee that the population of the birds would be negatively affected. It is highly probable that the population remains unaffected. It could also be a case that the number of tourists in the area would increase substantially because of the construction of a new hotel. The new hotel could have special arrangements like having a tour guide available 24x7 to help the tourists explore the Youngtown WiIldlife Preserve. Without any clarification on the aforementioned possibilities, the group’s assumption that this deal would only have a negative impact on the bird’s and tourist population is unwarranted.
To conclude, although the author’s suggestion might hold water, indicating that the acquiring of a small part of the land of the Youngtown Wildlife Preserve by The Smith Corporation could have disastrous consequences on the area, he has to address the above-stated questions, if he hopes to bolster his suggestion. The author should shed more light on the credibility of his sources and dive into more depth about how it will adversely affect the population of different bird species.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2023-01-15 | Jorobe8 | 68 | view |
| 2022-11-19 | Swarnali Swarno | 58 | view |
| 2022-02-27 | Sumit68 | 62 | view |
| 2021-09-06 | shankar09 | 59 | view |
| 2021-05-21 | Varun Vora | 59 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
The argument one is wrong.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 27 15
No. of Words: 671 350
No. of Characters: 3311 1500
No. of Different Words: 261 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 5.09 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.934 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.833 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 215 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 183 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 134 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 95 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.852 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.411 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.519 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.311 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.493 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.158 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Transition Words or Phrases used:
actually, also, finally, first, firstly, hence, however, if, so, while, as to, in addition
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 33.0 19.6327345309 168% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 24.0 12.9520958084 185% => OK
Conjunction : 10.0 11.1786427146 89% => OK
Relative clauses : 27.0 13.6137724551 198% => OK
Pronoun: 57.0 28.8173652695 198% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 88.0 55.5748502994 158% => OK
Nominalization: 33.0 16.3942115768 201% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3389.0 2260.96107784 150% => OK
No of words: 671.0 441.139720559 152% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.05067064083 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.08956458786 4.56307096286 112% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.92571172379 2.78398813304 105% => OK
Unique words: 265.0 204.123752495 130% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.394932935917 0.468620217663 84% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 1031.4 705.55239521 146% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 9.0 4.96107784431 181% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 2.70958083832 148% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 27.0 19.7664670659 137% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 22.8473053892 105% => OK
Sentence length SD: 54.445225492 57.8364921388 94% => OK
Chars per sentence: 125.518518519 119.503703932 105% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.8518518519 23.324526521 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.33333333333 5.70786347227 58% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 0.0 5.25449101796 0% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 11.0 6.88822355289 160% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.340581392476 0.218282227539 156% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0927840824799 0.0743258471296 125% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0724140487151 0.0701772020484 103% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.195813107975 0.128457276422 152% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0661786949341 0.0628817314937 105% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.8 14.3799401198 103% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 55.58 48.3550499002 115% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.5 12.197005988 94% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.31 12.5979740519 98% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.03 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 136.0 98.500998004 138% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 12.3882235529 93% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 11.1389221557 104% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Write the essay in 30 minutes.
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.