Some people think that schools should concentrate on academic courses which are usèul to the career of students; courses like music and sports are not useful and therefore should not be offered. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
For some people, schools should focus on academic disciplines to better prepared for students’ future career, while alternatives such as music and sports should not be added to the syllabus. Personally, both mindset are logical , but the latter really convince me more.
On one hand, gifted subjects like music and sports should not be offered at school for many reasons. At first, teaching academic courses is considered as the principle approach of schools to ensure students’ accessibility to knowledge that is useful for their career paths. It is often reckoned that students who scores good grades in mandatory subjects at school are more able to gain more success in life than others. In that case, non-academic subjects contribution to one’s future is trivial, so the idea of eliminating these subjects from the curriculum is reasonable. Moreover, cost and space might be another compelling reason for not teaching music and sport since the cost for facilities like sound proof materials and designated facilities are excessively expensive.
On the other hand, music and sports lessons should also be carried at school. Since students are often under tremendous pressure from their studies, these gifted subjects provide students sense of relaxation, which might quickly relieve stress beside exhausting lessons and somehow encourage their academic performances when returning to mandatory courses. That way, their mental health is well treated, therefore significantly reduce the risk of suffering from mental illness. Non-academic disciplines such as music and sports could bring out hidden talents which some gifted may not known before because of family orientaton or financial issues. For that reason, public lessons is one of the best places where students are given the opportunity to discover and develop their capability in athletics and aesthetic fields as potential students might be specially trained in the hope that they will become music and sport figures in the near future.
In short, I think that academic subjects are indeed significant, but non-academic subjects such as music and sports should not be abandoned because of its positive impacts on students.
- Some people think that schools should concentrate on academic courses which are us ul to the career of students courses like music and sports are not useful and therefore should not be offered To what extent do you agree or disagree 78
- Some students prefer to take a gap year between high school and university to work or to travel Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages 89
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 228, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...us. Personally, both mindset are logical , but the latter really convince me more....
^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, may, moreover, really, so, therefore, well, while, i think, in short, such as, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 19.0 13.1623246493 144% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 7.85571142285 140% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 10.4138276553 144% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 7.30460921844 164% => OK
Pronoun: 19.0 24.0651302605 79% => OK
Preposition: 42.0 41.998997996 100% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.3376753507 24% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1855.0 1615.20841683 115% => OK
No of words: 339.0 315.596192385 107% => OK
Chars per words: 5.47197640118 5.12529762239 107% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.29091512845 4.20363070211 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71999357571 2.80592935109 97% => OK
Unique words: 192.0 176.041082164 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.566371681416 0.561755894193 101% => OK
syllable_count: 572.4 506.74238477 113% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 5.43587174349 92% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.76152304609 126% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 13.0 16.0721442886 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 26.0 20.2975951904 128% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 65.3677806382 49.4020404114 132% => OK
Chars per sentence: 142.692307692 106.682146367 134% => OK
Words per sentence: 26.0769230769 20.7667163134 126% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.07692307692 7.06120827912 129% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 3.9879759519 50% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 3.4128256513 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.297590029146 0.244688304435 122% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.110658960028 0.084324248473 131% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0827890053106 0.0667982634062 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.192147418748 0.151304729494 127% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0181914582294 0.056905535591 32% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.4 13.0946893788 133% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 36.63 50.2224549098 73% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.44779559118 150% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 14.6 11.3001002004 129% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 14.74 12.4159519038 119% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.21 8.58950901804 107% => OK
difficult_words: 92.0 78.4519038076 117% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 9.78957915832 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.4 10.1190380762 123% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.