TPO 40 Some parents offer their school age children money for each high grade mark they get in school Do you think this is a good idea Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer

Essay topics:

TPO 40:

Some parents offer their school-age children money for each high grade (mark) they get in school.
Do you think this is a good idea?
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Giving presents like money or etc. to children for achieving success is a very debatful topic. Some people believe this can change habitats of child and make them dependable to the presence of reward but in contrast, other believe this makes the child to progress faster and more enjoyable. In my point of view, the reward is a very effective approach that is useful for childs.

For the First reason, I should mention about structure of the brain that works with the rule of reward and punishment. Humans from the stone age advent up to now human learned many things with this rule. The brain likes to continue some affords that will have rewards to it. So with regards to this point, with bringing rewards like money parents are encouraging kids to try better again to have good grades. This matter will effect to the brain to make progress to obtain better results that satisfies this sense of reward.

The next reason that I believe is feedback. kids especially in childness should get feedback about their works to get a better estimation about their situation and better understanding about the consequences of their works or to know better why they are doing that. These questions are the source of motivation and willingness that can be inspiring for childs. Not only about the motivation, but also feedback can show them about the direction of their efforts and can be a better guidance to them to continue more.

The final point is that, for fixing this issue that rewarding make childs dependable to it and can cause some problem in where there is no reward, parents can use punishment sometimes to make some balance in rewarding/punishment system. So childs learn that sometimes there is no reward and in addition, there will be a punishment to confront them to both sides of consequences.

In conclusion, the reward is an effective way to motivate childs for moving forward and increase their ambition but like every other affair having balance is more important and parents can attain a better situation by using rewards in a balanced way.

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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 427, Rule ID: AFFECT_EFFECT[6]
Message: Did you mean 'affect'?
Suggestion: affect
...n to have good grades. This matter will effect to the brain to make progress to obtain...
^^^^^^
Line 5, column 45, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: Kids
...next reason that I believe is feedback. kids especially in childness should get feed...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, so, in addition, in conclusion, in contrast

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 15.1003584229 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 9.8082437276 122% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 13.8261648746 108% => OK
Relative clauses : 11.0 11.0286738351 100% => OK
Pronoun: 33.0 43.0788530466 77% => OK
Preposition: 55.0 52.1666666667 105% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 8.0752688172 211% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1716.0 1977.66487455 87% => OK
No of words: 352.0 407.700716846 86% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.875 4.8611393121 100% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.33147354134 4.48103885553 97% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.58661301522 2.67179642975 97% => OK
Unique words: 175.0 212.727598566 82% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.497159090909 0.524837075471 95% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 523.8 618.680645161 85% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.59856630824 31% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 3.51792114695 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 20.6003584229 78% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 22.0 20.1344086022 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 66.0358567371 48.9658058833 135% => OK
Chars per sentence: 107.25 100.406767564 107% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.0 20.6045352989 107% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.8125 5.45110844103 70% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.53405017921 110% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.5376344086 36% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.143020160997 0.236089414692 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0516747470707 0.076458572812 68% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.025131206822 0.0737576698707 34% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0828885681333 0.150856017488 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0161458249744 0.0645574589148 25% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 11.7677419355 107% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 57.61 58.1214874552 99% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.7 10.1575268817 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.02 10.9000537634 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.05 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 74.0 86.8835125448 85% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.5 10.002688172 75% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.0537634409 107% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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We are expecting: No. of Words: 350 while No. of Different Words: 200

Rates: 60.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 18.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.