The following is a letter to the editor of the Waymarsh Times.
"Traffic here in Waymarsh is becoming a problem. Although just three years ago a state traffic survey showed that the typical driving commuter took 20 minutes to get to work, the commute now takes closer to 40 minutes, according to the survey just completed. Members of the town council already have suggested more road building to address the problem, but as well as being expensive, the new construction will surely disrupt some of our residential neighborhoods. It would be better to follow the example of the nearby city of Garville. Last year Garville implemented a policy that rewards people who share rides to work, giving them coupons for free gas. Pollution levels in Garville have dropped since the policy was implemented, and people from Garville tell me that commuting times have fallen considerably. There is no reason why a policy like Garville's shouldn't work equally well in Waymarsh."
The author claims here that in Waymarsh there is an issue with traffic and driving commuters now take twenty more minutes than it took three years ago. And the author suggests that instead of building new roads they need to accept the same strategy as their neighboring city, rewarding people with free gas coupons who share rides to work. Stated this way, the argument is rife with holes and assumptions, and thus, is not complete and substantiated.
First, the author cites that the town council already suggested solving the problem by building more roads. However, the construction is expensive and will perturb some of the residential neighborhoods. Therefore, they need to implement the same strategy as Garville which has shown that the pollution has dropped in Garville. This is merely an assumption made without much solid ground. For example, the author assumes that because of that policy the pollution dropped, but did not provide any convincing evidence about what exactly caused that. What if the city’s council took other action that reduced pollution there? It would be more persuasive if the author provided more information about the pollution relation with the implemented policy.
Additionally, the author mentions that people in Garville told him that their driving commute decreased significantly. This point does not show any clear correlation between implemented policy and the driving time drop. The author did not state the number of people who had stated about the driving time decrease. What if they make up only a small percent of the population in Garville? Do these people live in the areas where traffic is loaded? It would be more convincing if the author gave the answer to these questions.
Finally, the author states that the same policy will work in Waymash, but does not give evidence of their similarities. To make his statement more reliable the author should mention whether these cities have the same population or not? Their geographical position and government policies are close to each other or not? Without reasonable responses to these questions, the reader is left with the feeling that it is the author’s wishful thinking rather than concrete evidence.
In conclusion, the author’s recommendation is unpersuasive in its current form. To bolster it further the author needs to provide a more detailed analysis about the pollution and driving time decrease in Garville. Moreover, he should provide details about the similarities of these both cities.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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| 2021-10-04 | miqbalhilmi | 73 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 2 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 402 350
No. of Characters: 2055 1500
No. of Different Words: 213 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.478 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.112 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.582 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 154 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 115 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 73 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 42 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 17.478 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.547 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.522 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.304 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.496 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.073 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 1, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...s, is not complete and substantiated. First, the author cites that the town co...
^^^
Line 3, column 165, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...struction is expensive and will perturb some of the residential neighborhoods. Therefore, t...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, however, if, moreover, so, therefore, thus, for example, in conclusion
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 19.6327345309 61% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 12.9520958084 62% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 16.0 13.6137724551 118% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 28.8173652695 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 40.0 55.5748502994 72% => OK
Nominalization: 22.0 16.3942115768 134% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2117.0 2260.96107784 94% => OK
No of words: 402.0 441.139720559 91% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.26616915423 5.12650576532 103% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.47771567384 4.56307096286 98% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.68647618235 2.78398813304 96% => OK
Unique words: 217.0 204.123752495 106% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.539800995025 0.468620217663 115% => OK
syllable_count: 645.3 705.55239521 91% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 4.96107784431 141% => OK
Article: 10.0 8.76447105788 114% => OK
Subordination: 0.0 2.70958083832 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 1.67365269461 239% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 17.0 22.8473053892 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 33.1074894867 57.8364921388 57% => The essay contains lots of sentences with the similar length. More sentence varieties wanted.
Chars per sentence: 92.0434782609 119.503703932 77% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.4782608696 23.324526521 75% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.95652173913 5.70786347227 69% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.20758483034 37% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 14.0 4.67664670659 299% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.137446414007 0.218282227539 63% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.039943128268 0.0743258471296 54% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.082683224322 0.0701772020484 118% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0842366467718 0.128457276422 66% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0837845582292 0.0628817314937 133% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 14.3799401198 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 54.22 48.3550499002 112% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.9 12.197005988 81% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.99 12.5979740519 103% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.6 8.32208582834 103% => OK
difficult_words: 105.0 98.500998004 107% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 11.1389221557 79% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.