Claim: Even though young people often receive the advice to “follow your dreams,” more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals.
Reason: Many people’s dreams are inherently selfish.
The speaker claims that even though young people are consistently suggested to follow their dreams, they should select their goals wisely. The reason behind the above claim is that many people are inherently selfish in setting their goals. I agree with the speaker's claim, on the contrary, the reason mentioned is argumentative. Certainly, any person should pick worthy goals, but the price of a goal is always subjective. For example, any human dreams to be a responsible personality, fundamentally speaking, the Cheif Minister of any state is the most responsible personality of that particular state, and the similar holds for the country. If that fellow picks a goal to become the Chief Minister, then his goal is judged as worthy.
Apparently, when choosing and wants come in to frame the scenario becomes enigmatic. Consider a person's dream is to become an influential personality and pick acting as his goal or choice to achieve his/her dreams. Statistically, in the view of current society that choice is considered selfish and only relates to fame. But, society forgets that fame and admiration for a person make him/ her an influential personality. The choice of his goal depends on what he/ she wants and may be depending on their respective skills, behavior, compatibility, etc. So, reasoning or criticizing that as selfish is merely trivial.
Apparently, selfish is an obvious terminology to be happy. Explicitly speaking, if any altruistic person donates many things to the needy and portrays himself to be benevolent, here that particular person is serving and satisfying people so that it provides him/ her peace of mind, and happiness. As he is performing all these activities for his happiness, hence he can be called selfish. So, if the reason is rephrased as 'people's dreams should not cost any sort of tranquility of any other individual'.
In sum, I hereby clearly state and concede with the speaker's claim that there should be more emphasis on picking worthy goals so that no person should step back at the point of paying prices. But, as mentioned the reason stated and being selfish is merely subjective, and I seriously condemn the reason stated by the speaker.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
---|---|---|---|
2023-10-18 | Adesina Boluwatito | 58 | view |
2023-10-03 | shamika@25 | 50 | view |
2023-10-03 | shamika@25 | 50 | view |
2023-09-17 | RIYA MODI | 50 | view |
2023-09-17 | RIYA MODI | 50 | view |
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- Claim Even though young people often receive the advice to follow your dreams more emphasis should be placed on picking worthy goals Reason Many people s dreams are inherently selfish 75
- Pirouettes Ballet School is the clear choice for any child Of all the dance schools in Elmtown Pirouettes has the most intensive program and our teachers have danced in the most prestigious ballet companies all over the world Many of our students have gon 64
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 67, Rule ID: ADMIT_ENJOY_VB[1]
Message: This verb is used with the gerund form: 'suggested following'.
Suggestion: suggested following
...en though young people are consistently suggested to follow their dreams, they should select their ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 37, Rule ID: NEEDS_FIXED[1]
Message: "wants come" is only accepted in certain dialects. For something more widely acceptable, try 'come' or 'to be come'.
Suggestion: come; to be come
... Apparently, when choosing and wants come in to frame the scenario becomes enigma...
^^^^
Line 3, column 484, Rule ID: PROGRESSIVE_VERBS[1]
Message: This verb is normally not used in the progressive form. Try a simple form instead.
...l depends on what he/ she wants and may be depending on their respective skills, behavior, c...
^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 619, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...zing that as selfish is merely trivial. Apparently, selfish is an obvious termin...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
apparently, but, hence, if, may, so, then, for example, sort of, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 22.0 19.5258426966 113% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 7.0 12.4196629213 56% => OK
Conjunction : 15.0 14.8657303371 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 11.3162921348 106% => OK
Pronoun: 36.0 33.0505617978 109% => OK
Preposition: 33.0 58.6224719101 56% => More preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 1.0 12.9106741573 8% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1835.0 2235.4752809 82% => OK
No of words: 360.0 442.535393258 81% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.09722222222 5.05705443957 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.35587717469 4.55969084622 96% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.83604309419 2.79657885939 101% => OK
Unique words: 196.0 215.323595506 91% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.544444444444 0.4932671777 110% => OK
syllable_count: 564.3 704.065955056 80% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 6.24550561798 48% => OK
Article: 5.0 4.99550561798 100% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.10617977528 193% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.77640449438 225% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.38483146067 68% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.2370786517 89% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 23.0359550562 87% => OK
Sentence length SD: 48.3423044037 60.3974514979 80% => OK
Chars per sentence: 101.944444444 118.986275619 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0 23.4991977007 85% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.44444444444 5.21951772744 85% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.97078651685 80% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 7.80617977528 51% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 10.2758426966 117% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 4.0 5.13820224719 78% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.32707560345 0.243740707755 134% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0981592345384 0.0831039109588 118% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0719498223376 0.0758088955206 95% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.198144073487 0.150359130593 132% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0838682283864 0.0667264976115 126% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.6 14.1392134831 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.8420337079 105% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.92365168539 111% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.1743820225 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.3 12.1639044944 101% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.4 8.38706741573 100% => OK
difficult_words: 86.0 100.480337079 86% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 12.0 11.8971910112 101% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.2143820225 89% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5/6 paragraphs with 3/4 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: reason 4. address both of the views presented for reason 4 (optional)
para 6: conclusion.
Rates: 75.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.5 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.