Altruism

Essay topics:

Altruism

The author and the lecturer both talk about Altruism. The author explains Altruism as the opposite of selfishness where the lecturer accepts this, but he refutes the author's reasoning with his examples.

The author of the passage mentions humans as an example, where he explains unselfish acts of humans like sharing food with strangers to donating body parts to family members are acts of Altruism. The argument is challenged by the lecturer. She mentions that donating body parts to family members makes donors receive appreciation from society and it is only to be seen as an act to increase their self-worth.

Secondly, the author supports his point about animals taking meerkats, as an example where one animal keeps guard for their group starving, the one in most danger from the attack of a predator, the one who signals when there is an attack from a predator. The author concludes that this is an act of Altruism among animals.The author then concludes that this behaviour helps survival of the group. In contrast, the lecturer's stance on meerkats is quite different, she mentions that based on recent studies on meerkats have shown that they are not creatures that show Altruism, but selfishness. She proves this by saying meerkat only goes to keep guard after eating whereas the ones who search for food starve, it is safest from the predator as it can give the signal and run into the burrow, the signal it shouts could be to gather instead of run such that it could escape safely whereas other meerkats die in its place. The lecturer concludes by saying this is not Altruism but selfishness among meerkats.

Votes
Average: 8.1 (1 vote)
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Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 1, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...authors reasoning with his examples. The author of the passage mentions humans a...
^^^
Line 3, column 197, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...to family members are acts of Altruism. The argument is challenged by the lecturer....
^^^
Line 5, column 323, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: The
...his is an act of Altruism among animals.The author then concludes that this behavio...
^^^
Line 5, column 415, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'lecturers'' or 'lecturer's'?
Suggestion: lecturers'; lecturer's
...survival of the group. In contrast, the lecturers stance on meerkats is quite different, ...
^^^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, if, second, secondly, so, then, whereas, in contrast

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 11.0 10.4613686534 105% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 5.04856512141 59% => OK
Conjunction : 6.0 7.30242825607 82% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 12.0772626932 108% => OK
Pronoun: 28.0 22.412803532 125% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 38.0 30.3222958057 125% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 5.01324503311 40% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1353.0 1373.03311258 99% => OK
No of words: 275.0 270.72406181 102% => OK
Chars per words: 4.92 5.08290768461 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.07223819929 4.04702891845 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.46449431556 2.5805825403 96% => OK
Unique words: 147.0 145.348785872 101% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.534545454545 0.540411800872 99% => OK
syllable_count: 400.5 419.366225166 96% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.55342163355 97% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 4.0 3.25607064018 123% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.23620309051 146% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 1.25165562914 80% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 1.51434878587 132% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 2.5761589404 39% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 10.0 13.0662251656 77% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 27.0 21.2450331126 127% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 83.7661029295 49.2860985944 170% => OK
Chars per sentence: 135.3 110.228320801 123% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.5 21.698381199 127% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.7 7.06452816374 81% => OK
Paragraphs: 3.0 4.09492273731 73% => More paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 4.0 4.19205298013 95% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 4.0 4.33554083885 92% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 4.45695364238 112% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 4.27373068433 23% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.204163826428 0.272083759551 75% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.117573087144 0.0996497079465 118% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.107541676251 0.0662205650399 162% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.16261232294 0.162205337803 100% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0727080685084 0.0443174109184 164% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.5 13.3589403974 116% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 52.53 53.8541721854 98% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 5.55761589404 56% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.6 11.0289183223 114% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.55 12.2367328918 94% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.59 8.42419426049 102% => OK
difficult_words: 63.0 63.6247240618 99% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 10.7273730684 84% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 10.498013245 122% => OK
text_standard: 13.0 11.2008830022 116% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Minimum four paragraphs wanted. The correct pattern:

para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3

Less contents wanted from the reading passages(25%), more content wanted from the lecture (75%).

Don't need a conclusion paragraph.

Read sample essays from ETS:
http://www.testbig.com/users/toeflwritingmaster


Rates: 81.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 24.5 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.