The director of the International Health Foundation recently released this announcement:
"A new medical test that allows the early detection of a particular disease will prevent the deaths of people all over the world who would otherwise die from the disease. The test has been extremely effective in allowing doctors to diagnose the disease six months to a year before it would have been spotted by conventional means. As soon as we can institute this test as a routine procedure in hospitals around the world, the death rate from this disease will plummet."
The director of the International Health Foundation predicted that a new medical test will completely eradicate deaths caused by a particular disease because the medical test enables the early detection of the disease. However, the statement of the director is flawed because the director has assumed that the detection of the disease equals an automatic cure, a cure is available worldwide, and that tests are 100% accurate.
First of all, the director claimed that all deaths caused by a disease will disappear with the emergence of the new medical test. By making this statement, the director assumes that the detection of the disease equals treatment. However, suppose that the disease is brain cancer. Even if physicians could accurately detect brain cancer, they cannot guarantee that all patients with brain cancer can completely recover from their illness. If the director could prove that the detection of the disease guarantees recovery, such as a disease that could be instantaneously treated and eradicated by a medicine, the predictions of the director would be more persuasive.
In addition, even if the detection of the disease promises treatment and recovery, the detection of the disease does not signify that the disease is wiped out from the surface of Earth. For example, if the disease can only be cured by the blood of a minatory dragon in the mountains (a common plot in mythology), then even the detection of the disease and the knowledge of the cure do not guarantee healing. The director must offer evidence that suggests that the cure of the disease is readily availble across the world and can be immediately administered after the detection of the disease to make his or her arguments more convincing.
Finally, scientists all know that tests are never 100% accurate. Even if the disease is curable after it has been detected and a cure is available worldwide, the possibility of a false negative test implies that some patients might have the disease but are incorrectly classfied as patients without the disease. Therefore, the director is jumping to conclusions by asserting that the new medical test can prevent all deaths caused by the disease, since the test is bound to miss at least one pateint.
In conclusion, the director can make his or her arguments more powerful by providing evidence that demonstrates that the early detection of a disease guarantees a complete cure and medicine required for the cure are availble worldwide. Even so, the director would be unwise to simply state that the medical test can wipe out the disease becuase all tests are flawed and never entirely correct.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2023-06-23 | Mateo Chen | 60 | view |
| 2022-11-02 | John7A7 | 73 | view |
| 2022-01-12 | Abdulhafeez | 66 | view |
| 2021-12-22 | Abdulhafeez | 52 | view |
| 2021-07-21 | tolubakare | 60 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 432 350
No. of Characters: 2154 1500
No. of Different Words: 177 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.559 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.986 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.663 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 164 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 142 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 90 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 56 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 28.8 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.387 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.484 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.484 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.213 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 1 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 427, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...wide, and that tests are 100% accurate. First of all, the director claimed that ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, finally, first, however, if, so, then, therefore, at least, even so, for example, in addition, in conclusion, such as, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 20.0 19.6327345309 102% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 18.0 13.6137724551 132% => OK
Pronoun: 26.0 28.8173652695 90% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 55.5748502994 85% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 16.3942115768 110% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2202.0 2260.96107784 97% => OK
No of words: 432.0 441.139720559 98% => OK
Chars per words: 5.09722222222 5.12650576532 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.55901411391 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.74111218079 2.78398813304 98% => OK
Unique words: 182.0 204.123752495 89% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.421296296296 0.468620217663 90% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 713.7 705.55239521 101% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.59920159681 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 4.96107784431 20% => OK
Article: 12.0 8.76447105788 137% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.70958083832 221% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 1.0 1.67365269461 60% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 15.0 19.7664670659 76% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 28.0 22.8473053892 123% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 60.9865558955 57.8364921388 105% => OK
Chars per sentence: 146.8 119.503703932 123% => OK
Words per sentence: 28.8 23.324526521 123% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.06666666667 5.70786347227 159% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.25449101796 19% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.20758483034 37% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 6.0 6.88822355289 87% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.67664670659 128% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.325745047084 0.218282227539 149% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.134030824406 0.0743258471296 180% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0890230034812 0.0701772020484 127% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.208975754493 0.128457276422 163% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0640266643927 0.0628817314937 102% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.0 14.3799401198 118% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 34.6 48.3550499002 72% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 15.4 12.197005988 126% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.89 12.5979740519 102% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.53 8.32208582834 102% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 98.500998004 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.0 12.3882235529 113% => OK
gunning_fog: 13.2 11.1389221557 119% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.