Overpopulation of urban areas has led to numerous problems. Identify one or two serious problems and suggest ways that government and individuals can tackle these problems.
DRAFT 2: Please check my essay and consider whether it reachs the B2+ level or not. Are all the ideas logical, coherent and fully-supported?
Overpopulation is one of serious issues that most urban areas in the world are facing nowadays. The United Nations Department of Economic and Social Affairs (2018) claims that “55% of the world’s population lives in urban areas, a proportion that is expected to increase to 68% by 2050”. The populace soars cause multiple problems for metropolitan regions, particularly air pollution and unemployment. Thus, both government and individuals have to find solutions to overcome them.
First and foremost, the population explosion might lead to air pollution. There is an increase in air pollutants in metropolitan regions resulting from human activities. Emissions of air contaminants is caused by different anthropogenic processes, especially due to burning of fossil fuels from vehicles. The use of fossil fuels from transportation releases dangerous toxins into the atmosphere and poses numerous threats to the inhabitants. To illustrate, Bezuglaya (1996) reports that emissions and concentrations of CO and NO2 have risen by more than 10% in the last ten years in selected cities in the Russian Federation, as the results of the increasing number of defective motor vehicles on urban motorways (as cited in Mayer, 1999).
To tackle this issue, governments and individuals from other cities can consider China's solutions. The effective methods adopted in this country are pushing to abandon fossil fuels as well as the reduction in conventional vehicles and switching to electric vehicles. According to Beall (2018), China ranks first worldwide in electric vehicle usage with 777,000 new electric vehicles sold in 2017, which increased 53% in comparison with 2016. In Beijing, "fines for pollution topped $28 million in 2015". The amount of PM2.5, particles with a diameter of fewer than 2.5 micrometers, decreased markedly by 27% between 2013 and 2016 in the Beijing-Tianjin-Hebei region, which can prove the efficiency of these strategies (Beall, 2018).
A second consequence of civic overcrowding is unemployment. Wei (2011) states that in China, the growth of metropolitan population can be correlated with a massive surge in the employable urban labor force: “about 81 million or some 75% of the total increase in labor supply nationwide”. In 2004, “the figure total labor supply reached 768 million, which is about 18% larger than that of 1991” (Wei, 2011). This growth in labor participation in inner-cities has exceeded that of labor demand by a wide margin. For this reason, the competition for searching a promising career is getting fiercer along with urban joblessness. Of the statistics gathered by the State Statistical Bureau of China, in 2004, the economy-wide official idleness ratio in urban localities was 4.1%, which involved more than 8 million employed (cited in Wei, 2011).
To address the high rate of joblessness, authorities and citizens need to have appropriate remedies. A solution is for the government is to promote job creation in the private sector, thereby increasing job opportunities in urban areas. Simultaneously, individuals can significantly contribute to combatting the issue by become self-employed. For instance, in China, in recent years, about 80-90% of laid-off workers joined non-governmental and small businesses or engaged in self-employment; as a result, the private sector accounted for two-thirds of total urban employment and one-third of formal employment in 2004. (Betcherman & Blunch, 2006; Giles, Park & Cai, 2006 cited in Vodopivec & Tong, 2008).
In conclusion, the overcrowding is a pressing issue in urban areas, which results in the seriously polluted air and the decreasing labor employment proportion. Hence, restricting fossil fuels and promoting electrical vehicles utilization as well as encouraging the development of private sector and increase of self-unemployment can be practical approaches to ameliorate these situations.
(Total: 594 words)
References
Beall, A. (2018). How China can help London fix its air pollution crisis. No, seriously. Retrieved from https://www.wired.co.uk/article/london-air-pollution
Mayer, H. (1999). Air Pollution in Cities. Atmospheric Environment, 33(24), 4029-4037. doi:10.1016/S1352-2310(99)00144-2
United Nations Department of Economic and Social Affairs (UN DESA). (2018). 2018 Revision of World Urbanization Prospects | Multimedia Library - United Nations Department of Economic and Social Affairs. Retrieved from https://www.un.org/development/desa/publications/2018-revision-of-world…
Vodopivec, M., & Tong, M. H. (2008). China: Improving Unemployment Insurance. Retrieved from http://siteresources.worldbank.org/SOCIALPROTECTION/Resources/SP-Discus…
Wei, G. (2011). China’s Urban Unemployment Challenge [PDF file]. International Journal of Business and Social Science, 2. Retrieved from http://ijbssnet.com/journals/Vol._2_No._4;_March_2011/3.pdf
GROUP 3 - 18E15 - ULIS
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-11-27 | ngochong0258 | 78 | view |
Grammar and spelling errors:
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, hence, if, may, second, so, third, thus, well, for instance, in conclusion, as a result, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 16.0 13.1623246493 122% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 8.0 7.85571142285 102% => OK
Conjunction : 24.0 10.4138276553 230% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 12.0 7.30460921844 164% => OK
Pronoun: 17.0 24.0651302605 71% => OK
Preposition: 109.0 41.998997996 260% => Less preposition wanted.
Nominalization: 41.0 8.3376753507 492% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 4626.0 1615.20841683 286% => Less number of characters wanted.
No of words: 716.0 315.596192385 227% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 6.46089385475 5.12529762239 126% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.17283059074 4.20363070211 123% => OK
Word Length SD: 8.39188737379 2.80592935109 299% => Word_Length_SD is high.
Unique words: 404.0 176.041082164 229% => Less unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.564245810056 0.561755894193 100% => OK
syllable_count: 1252.8 506.74238477 247% => syllable counts are too long.
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.60771543086 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 1.0 5.43587174349 18% => OK
Article: 15.0 2.52805611222 593% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 2.0 2.10420841683 95% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 13.0 4.76152304609 273% => Less preposition wanted as sentence beginnings.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 42.0 16.0721442886 261% => Too many sentences.
Sentence length: 17.0 20.2975951904 84% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 66.7415038761 49.4020404114 135% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.142857143 106.682146367 103% => OK
Words per sentence: 17.0476190476 20.7667163134 82% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.64285714286 7.06120827912 37% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 13.0 4.38176352705 297% => Less paragraphs wanted.
Language errors: 11.0 5.01903807615 219% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 17.0 8.67935871743 196% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 10.0 3.9879759519 251% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 16.0 3.4128256513 469% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.120095612134 0.244688304435 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0260155953764 0.084324248473 31% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0419457804887 0.0667982634062 63% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0383330497736 0.151304729494 25% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0418551159138 0.056905535591 74% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 17.5 13.0946893788 134% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 45.76 50.2224549098 91% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 11.3001002004 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 19.89 12.4159519038 160% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.75 8.58950901804 114% => OK
difficult_words: 239.0 78.4519038076 305% => Less difficult words wanted.
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 9.78957915832 87% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.8 10.1190380762 87% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Maximum five paragraphs wanted.
Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.67 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.