Kaplan 4th Edition - Sample Practice 2 - Genetically Modified Foods

Essay topics:

Kaplan 4th Edition - Sample Practice 2 - Genetically Modified Foods

The lecture and the passage both focus on genetically modified (GM) food but have different opinions. While the writer has a very positive view on GM foods, the speaker is totally against it. The author and the tutor have several reasons for their position.

At the beginning the author explains how food is been modified (isolation of genes) and what the impact of that is. He or she explains that a gene modification could make food resistant to almost every weakness such as pest, cold or herbicides. Furthermore it is said, that gene modification of food helps the environment because of the reduction of toxic pesticides as there is no use for them anymore. The last argument why the writer has a positive view on this topic is that the population will double in future and only with gene modification of food it will be possible to have enough food for every human being.

In contrast, the speaker has three main points against GM food that can be categorized as follows: environment, health and economy. She says that “cross-pollination” is a tremendous risk for the environment. The wind transfers modified genes to other plants and could affect them. Regarding health, she explains that because of GM food there are much more allergies than before. At the end the professor explains that big companies spend a lot of money in the development of GM food. As a result, the prices raises and small farmers are not able to compete anymore. This will widen the gap between rich and poor.

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Comments

Sentence: At the beginning the author explains how food is been modified isolation of genes and what the impact of that is.
Description: The token is is not usually followed by a verb 'to be', past participle
Suggestion: Refer to is and been

Sentence: As a result, the prices raises and small farmers are not able to compete anymore.
Description: The fragment prices raises and is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace raises with verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive

flaws:
Not on the right format.

The correct pattern:

para 1: introduction
para 2: doubt 1
para 3: doubt 2
para 4: doubt 3

Don't need to reiterate the contents of reading passages.

Don't need a conclusion.

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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 20 in 30
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 2 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 14 10
No. of Words: 258 250
No. of Characters: 1204 1200
No. of Different Words: 144 150
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.008 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.667 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.62 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 76 80
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 58 60
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 40 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 25 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.429 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.716 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.5 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.326 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.486 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.14 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 3 4