playing computer game is a waste of time.children should not be allowed to play them.
Entertainments are the important part of human life. Besides adult children also need some spare time to be relax thus in my point of view playing computer games is not a waste of time and should not forbid by parents.
First, Entertainments are the important part of human life. Besides adult children also need some spare time to be relax. They need some time to be refresh after classroom hours. However, the significant issue is limiting the time, if parent limit the time in which children play games it will be not harmful. Otherwise, Computer game can take children time and will be a hinder to children development.
Second, playing computer game can help intellectual development in children. While they playing they can cooperate with co-players and enjoy it, they learn to how cooperate and interact with others. Furthermore, recent research indicate that not only computer game cannot harm for children but also force them to think deeply; they have to obey and memorize some rule to Win. This kind of playing prepare children a vast area of imagination, in the computer game the characters are fictitious thus it help children to improve their imagination ability.
In addition, any eligible citizen must know at least the basic information about computer thus, playing computer game help children to be familiar with computer and its program to be used better in future. the last but not least, it seems some parents concern about the children toward playing much time playing computer game and sometimes long a day in front of computer scene, In my view if parents inhibit computer game totally the children have not enough common issue to share among their classmate and may it cause to be isolate. I believe that by allocating a specific time for children to playing this problem can be solved. Parent should monitor their children time of playing rather than inhibit playing.
To wrap it up in my opinion, if time managing occur by parents toward children computer game playing, this playing advantageous weight more from disadvantageous. So I totally agree with children should be allowed to playing computer games.
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Sentence: Furthermore, recent research indicate that not only computer game cannot harm for children but also force them to think deeply; they have to obey and memorize some rule to Win.
Description: The fragment research indicate that is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace indicate with verb, past tense
Sentence: This kind of playing prepare children a vast area of imagination, in the computer game the characters are fictitious thus it help children to improve their imagination ability.
Description: A verb, present participle or gerund is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to playing and prepare
Sentence: To wrap it up in my opinion, if time managing occur by parents toward children computer game playing, this playing advantageous weight more from disadvantageous.
Description: A verb, present participle or gerund is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to managing and occur
flaws:
No. of Different Words: 167 200
Still need to improve vocabulary words.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 22 out of 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 3 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 17 15
No. of Words: 355 350
No. of Characters: 1744 1500
No. of Different Words: 167 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.341 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.913 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.539 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 122 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 101 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 63 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 24 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.882 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 17.593 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.706 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.389 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.578 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.157 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5