Many people think that every individual is responsible for their happiness, but some people believe there are other external factors that influence us. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
While some people believe it is sorely ourselves who can make us happy, others suppose some individual variables affect our happiness. In my opinion, each one of them has the truth, and balancing the two elements would be the key to be happy.
On the one hand, the reason why some people think that nothing other than themselves can make them happy is that they assume happiness something subjective in its nature. From the perspective of these people, it is impossible to rely on external subjects to be happy, because the definition of happiness varies from person to person. Such an attitude is specifically prevalent among the people like chief executive officers or politicians who are highly self-reliant.
On the other hand, the cause why the people in the opposite side regard external factors as essential to become happy is these people admit that there are limitations on what we can do by ourselves. These limitations lead the people to the direction where they tend to think happiness as a kind of grace coming from outside. This is especially epitomised in the psyche of religious people who are always wishing some of divine intervention.
Both of the two opinions are reasonable and understandable respectively, and therefore, I personally believe that we should be balanced between them. For one thing, it is unhealthy if we abandon the effort to make ourselves happy on the pretext of the existence of these external factors. That is, if such an enervation is prevail among a society, this will stagnate its economy and lose the social vitality as a whole. For another thing, at the same time, it is also unsound never to admit there would be something unchangeable and uncontrollable. Namely, if we always try to do something with everything at any cost whilst not knowing our own limits, it will definitely lead us to a kind of paranoia.
In conclusion, our own responsibility and external factors are indispensable together in order to be happy, and if we truly wish to be so, it is the key to accept the things we cannot change, and change the things we can, as the famous Serenity Prayer says.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 393, Rule ID: PROGRESSIVE_VERBS[1]
Message: This verb is normally not used in the progressive form. Try a simple form instead.
...d in the psyche of religious people who are always wishing some of divine intervention. Both of t...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 323, Rule ID: BEEN_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Consider using a past participle here: 'prevailed'.
Suggestion: prevailed
...tors. That is, if such an enervation is prevail among a society, this will stagnate its...
^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, if, so, therefore, while, another thing, in conclusion, kind of, for another thing, for one thing, in my opinion, on the other hand
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 13.1623246493 175% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 7.85571142285 127% => OK
Conjunction : 9.0 10.4138276553 86% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 7.30460921844 123% => OK
Pronoun: 42.0 24.0651302605 175% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 49.0 41.998997996 117% => OK
Nominalization: 5.0 8.3376753507 60% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1759.0 1615.20841683 109% => OK
No of words: 362.0 315.596192385 115% => OK
Chars per words: 4.8591160221 5.12529762239 95% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.36191444098 4.20363070211 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.8310550802 2.80592935109 101% => OK
Unique words: 191.0 176.041082164 108% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.527624309392 0.561755894193 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 581.4 506.74238477 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 5.43587174349 202% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 2.0 2.52805611222 79% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 2.10420841683 238% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 4.0 0.809619238477 494% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.76152304609 126% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 14.0 16.0721442886 87% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 20.2975951904 123% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 37.3964556871 49.4020404114 76% => OK
Chars per sentence: 125.642857143 106.682146367 118% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.8571428571 20.7667163134 125% => OK
Discourse Markers: 9.78571428571 7.06120827912 139% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.67935871743 127% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 3.9879759519 75% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 0.0 3.4128256513 0% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.250490650385 0.244688304435 102% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0855962808237 0.084324248473 102% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0661377425865 0.0667982634062 99% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.140172509444 0.151304729494 93% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.063380311131 0.056905535591 111% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.4 13.0946893788 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 46.1 50.2224549098 92% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.0 11.3001002004 115% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.2 12.4159519038 90% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.37 8.58950901804 97% => OK
difficult_words: 80.0 78.4519038076 102% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.5 9.78957915832 138% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 10.1190380762 119% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 10.7795591182 130% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 67.4157303371 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 6.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.