Many people think that children's education is much easier now due to the availability of all the technological means. They say that kids nowadays are more excited to study because they can learn by playing on the tablets, cell phones or computers. Although I understand their point of view, I have a different opinion. I believe that these technological machines are the main reason that makes studying is a harder process than it was before, simply because they attract the children, they make the children dependable on them.
First of all, as these cell phones, tablets and computers attract the adults and consume a big part of their time, they do the same with the kids. Kids are so attracted to those machines may be even more than adults. As a result, it takes forever to persuade a child that he/she should leave those machines so they can do their homework or do some projects either for school or for home. I experienced that in my own life on a daily bases. When I have to be in a big argument with my first grader son about keeping his tablet aside until he finishes his homework. And all the time he bargains me to leave him five more minutes or to delay his homework to the next day. I suffer daily from these technological machines that I regret that I acquired them at my house. Now I really hate them. They make life harder and kids studying more challenging.
Second, our generation was accused of being dependable on the calculator (the big invention that time) and that we stopped using our mind. I can't imagine our parents now seeing our kids depending on computers to do everything for them. Kids don't even bother themselves by learning how to write their letters and words using paper and pen, instead, they type on the keyboards. They don't think about solving a math problem. they run them through certain computer software. They become really dependable on those machines that they stopped using our natural program that called the brain. I really feel so sorry for those poor kids because they really stopped thinking logically, instead they ask google about everything.
in conclusion, for the reasons mentioned above, I encourage every parent to make an electronic free week every now and then. Why you don't make this week as soon as possible. If you did so you'll discover for yourself how the kids get more active as they will restart using their brain again and at the same time you will struggle less with their studying schedule.
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- TPO 44 - Integrated Writing Task 80
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 441, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “When” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...d that in my own life on a daily bases. When I have to be in a big argument with my ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 140, Rule ID: CANT[1]
Message: Did you mean 'can't' or 'cannot'?
Suggestion: can't; cannot
...e and that we stopped using our mind. I cant imagine our parents now seeing our kids...
^^^^
Line 3, column 240, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...mputers to do everything for them. Kids dont even bother themselves by learning how ...
^^^^
Line 3, column 380, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...stead, they type on the keyboards. They dont think about solving a math problem. the...
^^^^
Line 3, column 421, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: They
...ont think about solving a math problem. they run them through certain computer softw...
^^^^
Line 4, column 1, Rule ID: UPPERCASE_SENTENCE_START
Message: This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
Suggestion: In
...tead they ask google about everything. in conclusion, for the reasons mentioned a...
^^
Line 4, column 106, Rule ID: EVERY_NOW_AND_THEN[1]
Message: Use simply 'now and then'.
Suggestion: now and then
... parent to make an electronic free week every now and then. Why you dont make this week as soon as...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 133, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: don't
...c free week every now and then. Why you dont make this week as soon as possible. If ...
^^^^
Line 4, column 188, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: you'll
...week as soon as possible. If you did so youll discover for yourself how the kids get ...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
first, if, may, really, second, so, then, in conclusion, as a result, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 10.0 15.1003584229 66% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 6.0 9.8082437276 61% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 13.8261648746 94% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.0286738351 118% => OK
Pronoun: 83.0 43.0788530466 193% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 41.0 52.1666666667 79% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 8.0752688172 50% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2030.0 1977.66487455 103% => OK
No of words: 433.0 407.700716846 106% => OK
Chars per words: 4.68822170901 4.8611393121 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56165014514 4.48103885553 102% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.44244863049 2.67179642975 91% => OK
Unique words: 227.0 212.727598566 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.524249422633 0.524837075471 100% => OK
syllable_count: 632.7 618.680645161 102% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.51630824373 99% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 17.0 9.59856630824 177% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 5.0 3.51792114695 142% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.94265232975 20% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 20.6003584229 112% => OK
Sentence length: 18.0 20.1344086022 89% => OK
Sentence length SD: 47.8281817723 48.9658058833 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 88.2608695652 100.406767564 88% => OK
Words per sentence: 18.8260869565 20.6045352989 91% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.5652173913 5.45110844103 65% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.5376344086 163% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 11.8709677419 93% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 3.85842293907 207% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.88709677419 82% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.175144711515 0.236089414692 74% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0498044176156 0.076458572812 65% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0406494159612 0.0737576698707 55% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.11377792981 0.150856017488 75% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0357495083743 0.0645574589148 55% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.1 11.7677419355 86% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 61.67 58.1214874552 106% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.92 10.9000537634 91% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.59 8.01818996416 95% => OK
difficult_words: 84.0 86.8835125448 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 9.2 10.0537634409 92% => OK
text_standard: 10.0 10.247311828 98% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.