The author states that the vandalism of the city of Amburg needs to decrease to revitalize its declining neighbourhoods. He further recommends installing high-intensity lighting for reducing it which he says is more effective than bicycle police patrols. He cites an example of the city of Belleville to support his argument. However, the argument in favour of conclusion lacks crucial evidence and sounds vulnerable.
The first question that needs to be asked is whether high-intensity lighting can decrease the vandalism or not. It is based on the false presumption that the cities of Belleville and Amburg have identical criminal patterns. Maybe the criminals in Amburg are not as yielding to the law compared to Belleville. Maybe conditions of the crimes have changed significantly since the last October due to change in laws. Perhaps the decrease in crime in Belleville can be attributed to other factors such as stricter enforcement of rules and punishment which are relatively inferior in Amburg city. In such a scenario tighter enforcement of city rules and stronger punishment should be enforced to solve the problem.
In addition, the example itself is weaker in the context that it does not provide any statistics on the crime in cities of Belleville and Amburg. A substantial difference in crime rates could also be the cause of the difference. Furthermore, the president's argument that police patrol is worse than high-intensity lighting does not have substantial proof. As the measures have been taken recently it may take some time for the effect to take place. It would be inappropriate if the author is expecting a result in say 10 days. Furthermore, a police patrol can be ineffective due to other reasons such patrolling on a bicycle may fail to catch the criminals if they run away in cars, in such cases police should be provided with faster vehicles.
Finally, the author states without proof that the vandalism is the reason for declining neighbourhoods in the city. Maybe vandalism is a non-violent crime so does not affect the residents in the central business district of the city. It is possible that the decline of neighbourhoods is due to rising housing prices or poor living conditions due to noise and air pollution. If this is true the city should take other measures such as restricting horns and late-night parties in neighbourhoods, shut down coal industries and solve the housing crisis to increase the population.
In conclusion, the author does not provide substantial proof for the claims made and the conclusion does not directly follow the argument. Hence the recommendation is unlikely to yield any effect on the city without further analysis is done.
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- The following appeared as part of a business plan developed by the manager of the Rialto Movie Theater."Despite its downtown location, the Rialto Movie Theater, a local institution for five decades, must make big changes or close i 25
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- The following appeared in a recommendation from the president of Amburg's Chamber of Commerce."Last October the city of Belleville installed high-intensity lighting in its central business district, and vandalism there declined wit 63
Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 22 15
No. of Words: 440 350
No. of Characters: 2222 1500
No. of Different Words: 205 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.58 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.05 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.945 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 164 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 124 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 95 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 60 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 6.098 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.636 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.288 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.499 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.062 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 601, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...ively inferior in Amburg city. In such a scenario tighter enforcement of city rul...
^^
Line 5, column 247, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'presidents'' or 'president's'?
Suggestion: presidents'; president's
...use of the difference. Furthermore, the presidents argument that police patrol is worse th...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 117, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...r declining neighbourhoods in the city. Maybe vandalism is a non-violent crime s...
^^
Line 9, column 140, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Hence,
... does not directly follow the argument. Hence the recommendation is unlikely to yield...
^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, finally, first, furthermore, hence, however, if, may, so, in addition, in conclusion, such as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 23.0 19.6327345309 117% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 10.0 12.9520958084 77% => OK
Conjunction : 11.0 11.1786427146 98% => OK
Relative clauses : 9.0 13.6137724551 66% => More relative clauses wanted.
Pronoun: 21.0 28.8173652695 73% => OK
Preposition: 56.0 55.5748502994 101% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 16.3942115768 104% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2267.0 2260.96107784 100% => OK
No of words: 440.0 441.139720559 100% => OK
Chars per words: 5.15227272727 5.12650576532 101% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.57997565096 4.56307096286 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 3.00646600013 2.78398813304 108% => OK
Unique words: 208.0 204.123752495 102% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.472727272727 0.468620217663 101% => OK
syllable_count: 708.3 705.55239521 100% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 9.0 8.76447105788 103% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 4.0 4.22255489022 95% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 22.0 19.7664670659 111% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 37.16247552 57.8364921388 64% => OK
Chars per sentence: 103.045454545 119.503703932 86% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0 23.324526521 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.72727272727 5.70786347227 83% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.25449101796 76% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 3.0 8.20758483034 37% => More positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 12.0 6.88822355289 174% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 7.0 4.67664670659 150% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.201954244537 0.218282227539 93% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0582555284271 0.0743258471296 78% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0497702740972 0.0701772020484 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.109168979585 0.128457276422 85% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0466580767799 0.0628817314937 74% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.8 14.3799401198 89% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.3550499002 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.59 12.5979740519 100% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.43 8.32208582834 101% => OK
difficult_words: 106.0 98.500998004 108% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 11.9071856287 76% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.