Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal
To what extent do you agree?
In recent days, there are many serious opinions about the future of ciggaretes. The health reason and did not have any advantages are the main opinions for people who advised smoke to be made illegal. In my opinion the smoke must be clean from any society.
To begin with, regarding the health situation of people. Smoke can cause a lot of disadvantages for people. Not only for people who consumed it, but also for the people who sit or stand near the smoker. the multiple effect of smoke has made huge effect over the world. Due to the rise of serious illnesses caused by smoke such as; cancer, asma, and impotent. Illegal is the right option for the future of ciggarete.
In addition, smoke which are born many years ago from indian culture as an friendship symbol has made big influence for many civilizations until nowadays. The cool of commecial and promotion from the movie also has made smoke become the most popular stuff, even in develop country smoke is the main consume for those people who live there. Without any possitive effect , these conditions are very dangerous for the future generation. Preventing the smoke growth by stop the commercial and made it illegal are the best solutions.
Finally, the illegal sollution are the best for the future of smoke, seriouss ilness and there are no advantages at all are the main reasons. Considering of the dangerous effect from the growth number of people who consumed it, it is very logic to ban any smoke from every society. In my personal opinion, the effect also can caused the people who sit near the smoker are the main reasons to make the smoke illegal.
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2013-11-20 | jackykeizen@gmail.com | 80 | view |
2013-11-10 | Tohir Bin Umar Irfa'i | 70 | view |
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did not have any advantages are the main opinions
Description: two verbs in one sentence.
Sentence: Illegal is the right option for the future of ciggarete.
Description: The fragment Illegal is is rare
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace Illegal with noun.
even in develop country
even in developed countries
Preventing the smoke growth by stop the commercial and made it illegal are the best solutions.
Preventing the smoke growth by stopping the commercial and made it illegal are the best solutions.
Sentence: Finally, the illegal sollution are the best for the future of smoke, seriouss ilness and there are no advantages at all are the main reasons.
Description: The fragment the illegal sollution is not usually followed by are
Suggestion: Possible agreement error: Replace are with is
the effect also can caused the people who sit near the smoker are the main reasons to make the smoke illegal.
Description: A modal auxillary is not usually followed by a verb, past participle
Suggestion: Refer to can and caused
Sentence: In recent days, there are many serious opinions about the future of ciggaretes.
Error: ciggaretes Suggestion: cigarettes
Sentence: The cool of commecial and promotion from the movie also has made smoke become the most popular stuff, even in develop country smoke is the main consume for those people who live there.
Error: commecial Suggestion: commercial
Sentence: Without any possitive effect , these conditions are very dangerous for the future generation.
Error: possitive Suggestion: positive
Sentence: Finally, the illegal sollution are the best for the future of smoke, seriouss ilness and there are no advantages at all are the main reasons.
Error: ilness Suggestion: illness
Error: seriouss Suggestion: serious
Error: sollution Suggestion: solution
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Different Words: 139 200
Read a good grammar book.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 6 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 283 350
No. of Characters: 1305 1500
No. of Different Words: 139 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.102 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.611 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.268 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 88 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 54 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 33 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 23 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 18.867 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.864 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.533 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.379 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.545 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.069 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5