Why does the applicant think that he/she is suitable for this program?
I feel very thankful that GCR Mongolia has announced this program to encourage Mongolian engineers to improve their skills and knowledge by working at Australian mining sites of RUC Cementation mining. After reading this program announcement posted on GCR Mongolia web site, I found that I am suitable for this program because requirements of this program meet my English language ability, work experience and academic achievements.
It is obvious that working in Australia will demand high English language ability from a worker who is not native English speaker. On November 3rd 2018, I took IELTS test and have got overall band score 6.5. Since IELTS test day, I am still reading books which are written in English and watching TV programs which are produced by CNN, BBC and National Geography. As well as, when I was working at Ukhaa Khudag coal mining which is led by Thiess mining, our direct manager was Australian man. The manager and our team used to work interactively and this activity attracted me to think how Australian mining companies work. Perhaps operation of Ukhaa Khudag mining is quite same as Australian system because it is managed by Thiess.
Between January 2015 and August 2017, I worked at Ukhaa Khudag mining site from Zamine Services LLC which is dealer of Hitachi Construction Machinery. During this period, I was working as a maintenance mechanic who is responsible for reliable and continuous operation of 3 Hitachi EX-3600 large hydraulic excavators. Hitachi EX-3600 hydraulic excavator is used in large mining projects over the world even in Australia and it has completely hydraulic system and 1450 kW Cummins diesel engine. Our team used to carry out all maintenance activities including PM services, rebuild work. Then I was working as a technician in Cummins workshop -- in which rebuilding works of Cummins diesel engines are carried out -- for 4 months. I became familiar with structure, operations, components and parts of diesel engines by working at Cummins. From march to September 2018, I was working as a maintenance planner from Wagner Asia Equipment LLC which is dealer of Caterpillar at Oyu Tolgoi project. I was responsible for maintenance planning of a fleet with over 100 equipment. By working as maintenance planner, I became familiar with how maintenance works are planned, organized and completed in mining environment.
In June 2014, I graduated university with bachelor degree in mining mechanical engineering and my GPA is 3.62 because I studied mechanical engineering academic programs properly. When I was studying, I was selected as an awardee of Oyu Tolgoi domestic scholarship and successfully participated national Olympiad of Theory of machines and mechanism. I suppose that fundamental factors of a good mechanical engineer are good knowledge of mechanical theory, work experience, positive attitude towards work and communication with co-workers. If I will be selected this program, I will do my best and thanks for giving this extraordinary opportunity to Mongolian engineers.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2019-03-25 | Baasansuren | 56 | view |
- The plans below show the layout of a university's sports center now, and how it will look after redevelopment.Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. 78
- In spite of the advance made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry.Why is this the case?What can be done about this problem? 73
- The plans below show the layout of a university's sports center now, and how it will look after redevelopment.Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. 56
- Why does the applicant think that he/she is suitable for this program? 56
- The plans below show the layout of a university's sports center now, and how it will look after redevelopment.Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. 78
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 266, Rule ID: WEB_SITE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'website'?
Suggestion: website
...ram announcement posted on GCR Mongolia web site, I found that I am suitable for this pr...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 462, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...d it has completely hydraulic system and 1450 kW Cummins diesel engine. Our team ...
^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
if, still, then, well, i feel, i suppose, as well as
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 13.1623246493 182% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 3.0 7.85571142285 38% => OK
Conjunction : 18.0 10.4138276553 173% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 7.30460921844 192% => OK
Pronoun: 43.0 24.0651302605 179% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 60.0 41.998997996 143% => OK
Nominalization: 17.0 8.3376753507 204% => Less nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2571.0 1615.20841683 159% => OK
No of words: 483.0 315.596192385 153% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.32298136646 5.12529762239 104% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68799114503 4.20363070211 112% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96650519045 2.80592935109 106% => OK
Unique words: 256.0 176.041082164 145% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.530020703934 0.561755894193 94% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 787.5 506.74238477 155% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 17.0 5.43587174349 313% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 1.0 2.52805611222 40% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 2.10420841683 285% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.809619238477 0% => OK
Preposition: 8.0 4.76152304609 168% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 16.0721442886 124% => OK
Sentence length: 24.0 20.2975951904 118% => OK
Sentence length SD: 41.0600474914 49.4020404114 83% => OK
Chars per sentence: 128.55 106.682146367 120% => OK
Words per sentence: 24.15 20.7667163134 116% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.6 7.06120827912 37% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.01903807615 40% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.67935871743 115% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.9879759519 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 3.4128256513 293% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.119732941306 0.244688304435 49% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0402102578671 0.084324248473 48% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0649183522217 0.0667982634062 97% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0944182128118 0.151304729494 62% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0718872028001 0.056905535591 126% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.7 13.0946893788 120% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.12 50.2224549098 94% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.7 11.3001002004 112% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.87 12.4159519038 112% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.95 8.58950901804 104% => OK
difficult_words: 126.0 78.4519038076 161% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 14.5 9.78957915832 148% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.6 10.1190380762 115% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 56.1797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.33 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.