It is true that today kids prefer to watch television than to do more creative activities. In this essay, I will discuss about the reasons of this addressed situation and alternatives that may be taken in order to increase children's interest to those activities.
There are two reasons for this kind of situation. Firstly, children nowadays live in the era where technology has developed faster than before. This has caused the technology gadgets to be more sophisticated, including television (abbreviated as TV). Previously, TV could only showed a very few channels that aired from TV stations, and not all of those are intended for children. But now, TV is a very sophisticated gadget, where it does not only airs the TV channels from TV stations, but also can play the YouTube videos. As we know, YouTube is a very popular video website that has a lot of show varieties including those for kids. This result to the increase of children's interest in watching TV. Rather than doing something creative or active, children choose to watch TV because it now has too many show varieties for children. Secondly, children usually do something that their neighborhood does, because it is children's common habit to imitate. Many children loves playing basketball because their peers also loves playing it. So if other children in their schools also like watching TV and dislike doing creative activities, they will also do it.
To overcome these problems, there are some alternatives that we can take. Firstly, related to the rapid development of TV, parents should have more control over TV. As a parents, we have to oversee our children and direct our kids to do something positive. Although TV now has more functions that before, if we can be children's friends and accompanying them to do active things together, of course children will leave those TVs. Secondly, about the children's environments that have big impacts to children's habits. If previously children only meet their friends who love watching television more than doing exercises, now we should enroll our kids to other positive communities. For example, by registering our kids to baseball club or swimming club, so that our children will be used to doing those activities, instead of just spending their time in sofas watching TV for entire day.
In conclusion, there are some reasons behind the increase of TV usage among children that causes the decrease of their doing of active and creative things, that can be solved with some alternatives, including accompanying and directing kids to do more positive things and also registering our kids to more positive communities.
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Why this essay only gets 5.5?
Why this essay only gets 5.5? Do you have any advices? Thank you
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 447, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[3]
Message: The verb 'does' requires base form of the verb: 'air'
Suggestion: air
...sticated gadget, where it does not only airs the TV channels from TV stations, but a...
^^^^
Line 3, column 967, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'love'.
Suggestion: love
... common habit to imitate. Many children loves playing basketball because their peers ...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 169, Rule ID: A_PLURAL[1]
Message: Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean 'a parent' or simply 'parents'?
Suggestion: a parent; parents
...ts should have more control over TV. As a parents, we have to oversee our children and di...
^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, firstly, if, may, second, secondly, so, as to, for example, in conclusion, kind of, of course, it is true
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 13.0 13.1623246493 99% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 12.0 7.85571142285 153% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 10.4138276553 115% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 7.30460921844 192% => OK
Pronoun: 48.0 24.0651302605 199% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 50.0 41.998997996 119% => OK
Nominalization: 3.0 8.3376753507 36% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2209.0 1615.20841683 137% => OK
No of words: 434.0 315.596192385 138% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.08986175115 5.12529762239 99% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.56428161445 4.20363070211 109% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76803690128 2.80592935109 99% => OK
Unique words: 199.0 176.041082164 113% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.458525345622 0.561755894193 82% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 672.3 506.74238477 133% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.60771543086 93% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 5.43587174349 129% => OK
Article: 0.0 2.52805611222 0% => OK
Subordination: 7.0 2.10420841683 333% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 3.0 0.809619238477 371% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 7.0 4.76152304609 147% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 16.0721442886 124% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.2975951904 103% => OK
Sentence length SD: 66.085909996 49.4020404114 134% => OK
Chars per sentence: 110.45 106.682146367 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.7 20.7667163134 104% => OK
Discourse Markers: 6.15 7.06120827912 87% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.01903807615 60% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.67935871743 150% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.9879759519 25% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 3.4128256513 176% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.254816013154 0.244688304435 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0875197193917 0.084324248473 104% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0555655964522 0.0667982634062 83% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.174640738588 0.151304729494 115% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0333651415819 0.056905535591 59% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 13.4 13.0946893788 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 58.62 50.2224549098 117% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 11.3001002004 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.24 12.4159519038 99% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.92 8.58950901804 92% => OK
difficult_words: 89.0 78.4519038076 113% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 9.78957915832 92% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.1190380762 103% => OK
text_standard: 9.0 10.7795591182 83% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 61.797752809 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 5.5 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.