You have just bought a new mobile phone from a website on the internet. When it was delivered, the phone was faulty.Write a letter to the company. In the letter:•introduce yourself•explain the situation•state what action you want to be taken

Essay topics:

You have just bought a new mobile phone from a website on the internet. When it was delivered, the phone was faulty.

Write a letter to the company. In the letter:

• introduce yourself

• explain the situation

• state what action you want to be taken

Dear website,

My name is john employed in a multinational organisation as a Software engineer. Recently purchased a new mobile phone from a website of your company on the internet. However, the purpose of this letter is to enlighten faults in the phone.

Firstly, the phone's 12-megapixel camera prints blurred pictures. In addition to this phone restarts at the opening of the camera application without alerting sign even though the phone's battery is full. Occasionally, the phone hangs for a few minutes after the attempt made to open any installed app. Secondly, the icon for bluetooth appears at the top bar, unfortunately never appears in the list of bluetooth devices on another device. Most Importantly, the phone becomes slower when using the internet or connected to the internet also uses more battery when not connected to the internet.

Furthermore, please refund full payment or replace the handset with the new one.

I look forward to a swift response concerning my concerns.

Yours Faithfully,

John Moses

Votes
Average: 7.8 (1 vote)
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Essays by user astrlw@hotmail.com :

Comments

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 5, column 180, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'phones'' or 'phone's'?
Suggestion: phones'; phone's
...n without alerting sign even though the phones battery is full. Occasionally, the phon...
^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, first, firstly, furthermore, however, if, look, second, secondly, so, in addition

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 3.0 7.48453608247 40% => More to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 0.0 4.92783505155 0% => OK
Conjunction : 2.0 5.05154639175 40% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 2.0 3.03092783505 66% => OK
Pronoun: 7.0 32.9175257732 21% => OK
Preposition: 22.0 26.3917525773 83% => OK
Nominalization: 4.0 3.85567010309 104% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 872.0 937.175257732 93% => OK
No of words: 165.0 206.0 80% => More content wanted.
Chars per words: 5.28484848485 4.54256449028 116% => OK
Fourth root words length: 3.58402463422 3.78020617076 95% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.87718615728 2.54303337028 113% => OK
Unique words: 110.0 127.690721649 86% => More unique words wanted.
Unique words percentage: 0.666666666667 0.622605031667 107% => OK
syllable_count: 274.5 290.88556701 94% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.7 1.41237113402 120% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 9.13402061856 33% => OK
Article: 5.0 0.824742268041 606% => Less articles wanted as sentence beginning.
Subordination: 0.0 1.83505154639 0% => More adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 0.0 0.463917525773 0% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 1.44329896907 69% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 11.0 12.6804123711 87% => OK
Sentence length: 15.0 16.3608247423 92% => OK
Sentence length SD: 35.9572749223 44.8134815571 80% => OK
Chars per sentence: 79.2727272727 76.5299724578 104% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.0 16.8248392259 89% => OK
Discourse Markers: 7.90909090909 4.34317383033 182% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.29896907216 93% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 2.54639175258 39% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 6.0 7.41237113402 81% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 1.49484536082 67% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 3.94845360825 101% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.187295502956 0.216113520407 87% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0645197691979 0.0766984524023 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0704506015774 0.0603063233224 117% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.090610611729 0.12726935374 71% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0828479439339 0.0580467560999 143% => OK

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.9 8.37731958763 130% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 47.79 70.7449484536 68% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 3.82989690722 81% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 10.3 7.45979381443 138% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 12.75 8.71597938144 146% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.45 7.59969072165 124% => OK
difficult_words: 53.0 41.2886597938 128% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 7.0 8.62886597938 81% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 8.54432989691 94% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 8.15463917526 135% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 78.6516853933 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 7.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.