Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? In order to become financially responsible adults, children should learn to manage their own money at young age. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
The most essential aspects to be successful today, is to know how to manage your capital wisely. Taking this idea into account, it has arisen a tendency where parents permit the youngsters to manage their own money, in order to they acquire abilities using it responsibly. Whether this idea is correct and advantageous for children or not, though, is a matter of intense debate. As far as I am concerned, I totally agree with this idea. this position is based on two main reasons that will be analyzed thoroughly below.
Firstly, with this method they learn what is the real value of the money and how hardly you have to work to get it. The money does not come from the air, and many of us learned it when we became young adults, and that is a lesson that children should learn right away. A convincing example of that is the case of my son John. since he was 12-year-old I began to give him a monthly budget for his expenses and teach him how to use it. he started to do some simple tasks at home and for our neighbors to get extra cash when he wanted to buy something like a new cell or the last video game. As a result, when he was 20-year-old, he introduced himself in the world of the electronic commerce and opened an online store. that project was a success owing to he had learned how to manage a budget and what to do to save it.
Secondly, independently which profession they choose for their future, the key to be successful is to know how to use the money gained judiciously since early ages. An Illustrative example of this is the case of the NBA players. they come into the league with ages that round the 18 years old. Officially they are adults, but many of them are not mature enough to manage millions of dollars. Consequently, you see how those that their parents taught them how to invest intelligently since child become in wealthy men, whereas others are simply filled themselves with loans and debts unpayable.
In summation, I am of the opinion that it is quite beneficial for kids to manage their own finances since youngsters. this is owing to it is a vital skill to be prosperous, regardless which profession they want to be in their future, and they learn how complicated is to get the money and, therefore, they value it more.
- TOEFL T P O 16 - Integrated Writing Task 3
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Grammar and spelling errors:
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...age a budget and what to do to save it. Secondly, independently which profession...
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...es with loans and debts unpayable. In summation, I am of the opinion that i...
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...ge their own finances since youngsters. this is owing to it is a vital skill to be p...
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Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, consequently, first, firstly, second, secondly, so, therefore, whereas, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 24.0 15.1003584229 159% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 9.8082437276 20% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 13.8261648746 101% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 11.0286738351 127% => OK
Pronoun: 62.0 43.0788530466 144% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 58.0 52.1666666667 111% => OK
Nominalization: 2.0 8.0752688172 25% => More nominalizations (nouns with a suffix like: tion ment ence ance) wanted.
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1876.0 1977.66487455 95% => OK
No of words: 413.0 407.700716846 101% => OK
Chars per words: 4.54237288136 4.8611393121 93% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.50803742585 4.48103885553 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.51985880475 2.67179642975 94% => OK
Unique words: 219.0 212.727598566 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.530266343826 0.524837075471 101% => OK
syllable_count: 580.5 618.680645161 94% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.51630824373 92% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 11.0 9.59856630824 115% => OK
Article: 5.0 3.08781362007 162% => OK
Subordination: 4.0 3.51792114695 114% => OK
Conjunction: 4.0 1.86738351254 214% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.94265232975 81% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 19.0 20.6003584229 92% => OK
Sentence length: 21.0 20.1344086022 104% => OK
Sentence length SD: 44.8333942614 48.9658058833 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 98.7368421053 100.406767564 98% => OK
Words per sentence: 21.7368421053 20.6045352989 105% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.63157894737 5.45110844103 85% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 8.0 5.5376344086 144% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 12.0 11.8709677419 101% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 3.85842293907 26% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 6.0 4.88709677419 123% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.221669658201 0.236089414692 94% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0643408159368 0.076458572812 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0398251323995 0.0737576698707 54% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.126077701514 0.150856017488 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.021712920678 0.0645574589148 34% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 10.8 11.7677419355 92% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 67.08 58.1214874552 115% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 6.10430107527 51% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 9.1 10.1575268817 90% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.05 10.9000537634 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.0 8.01818996416 100% => OK
difficult_words: 87.0 86.8835125448 100% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.0 10.002688172 80% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.4 10.0537634409 103% => OK
text_standard: 8.0 10.247311828 78% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 70.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 21.0 Out of 30
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.