given by the picture
The line graph compares the percentage of population aged 65 and over in Japan, Sweden and the USA over a period of the century between 1940 and 2040.
At the beginning of the period, the proportion in the USA was the least, at 5 %, until around 2032-2033 when it is forecast that the United States will catch up and even outcompete the rest of two countries. By contrast, the gap in the statistics between Japan and Sweden will not widen through the end of the whole period, being around 2 %, despite a nine-year period between 1995 and 2027, according to the estimations.
As can be seen from the graph, the proportion of the pensioner increases in all three states, but rises dramatically in the USA. The period between 2005 and about 2037 saw a sharp growth and in nearly 2037 it is predicted that the percentage of citizens who are from the given categories will be 5 times as much as in 2005.
Overall, the line graph affects that the fertility rate decreases significantly and the inhabitants of the developed countries are getting older.
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Sentence: At the beginning of the period, the proportion in the USA was the least, at 5 , until around 2032-2033 when it is forecast that the United States will catch up and even outcompete the rest of two countries.
Error: outcompete Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
You depicted the line graphs wrongly: the thicker one is USA not Japan.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 6 10
No. of Words: 184 200
No. of Characters: 838 1000
No. of Different Words: 104 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 3.683 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.554 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.583 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 52 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 38 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 28 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 24 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 30.667 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 7.016 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.167 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.49 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.818 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.064 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 4