The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
Throughout history, major breakthroughs that we bear the fruits of today have been achieved through collaboration, visionary leadership and cooperation. It is a huge part of achieving success in a task that requires the expertise of more than one person. The prompt claims that the best way to prepare to prepare young people for society and jobs is to expose them to the ideas of cooperation rather than competition, and while healthy competition is an important factor in keeping individuals motivated, I tend to mostly agree with the prompt due to the following reasons.
Firstly, when working in an organization that requires multiple people working together to achieve a certain goal or to complete even a trivial task, communication and harmony are key to success. Every person in a particular organization is chosen for a specific task and they all work together like parts of a machine, and when one piece falters, the whole system gets disrupted. For example, let us consider a team sport such as soccer, eleven players represent a team, and unless all players are in communication and cooperate with each other, the team cannot function effectively. If one player were to seek personal glory, that would be unwise and detrimental to the whole team. Similarly, when we apply this example to industries or organizations, if a person were to compete within the organization, the primary goal may be compromised. A cooperative attitude, if instilled while a person is young, can work effectively as they are most likely to learn and adopt ideas while at that age.
Secondly, a person in a leadership position is there to lead the team, to distribute work appropriately, and to inspire them, not to compete or to prove themselves to be better. A study conducted by McStudy has revealed that competitive leaders are much more likely to shut down ideas given by team members and to align to their own ideas. This is not surprising, as competitive people tend to want their own ideas to triumph as that gives them glory.
On the contrary, some might argue that instilling a competitive spirit may work effectively too, as competition inspires people to do better and to work harder. Without competition, the stakes may not be as high. This point would certainly be valid, as healthy amounts of competition can lead to a more motivated society, with the will to push further and be better, thus leading to innovative breakthroughs.
In conclusion, this is a very grey area and not as binary as it may seem. Cooperation is important for the effective functioning of a society, but so is competition when in healthy amounts. As people get older, they become more stubborn to ideas other than what they believe in, hence what young people are taught has a significant bearing on what they go on to become, and instilling a sense of cooperation is imperative for a non-toxic, efficient society.
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2024-10-31 | ekarumeblessing@icloud.com | 79 | view |
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Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 292, Rule ID: PHRASE_REPETITION[1]
Message: This phrase is duplicated. You should probably leave only 'to prepare'.
Suggestion: to prepare
...on. The prompt claims that the best way to prepare to prepare young people for society and jobs is to...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
but, first, firstly, hence, if, may, second, secondly, similarly, so, still, thus, while, as to, for example, in conclusion, such as, on the contrary
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 25.0 19.5258426966 128% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 11.0 12.4196629213 89% => OK
Conjunction : 20.0 14.8657303371 135% => OK
Relative clauses : 13.0 11.3162921348 115% => OK
Pronoun: 30.0 33.0505617978 91% => OK
Preposition: 66.0 58.6224719101 113% => OK
Nominalization: 18.0 12.9106741573 139% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2417.0 2235.4752809 108% => OK
No of words: 487.0 442.535393258 110% => OK
Chars per words: 4.96303901437 5.05705443957 98% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.69766713281 4.55969084622 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.96371841868 2.79657885939 106% => OK
Unique words: 253.0 215.323595506 117% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.519507186858 0.4932671777 105% => OK
syllable_count: 770.4 704.065955056 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59117977528 101% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 7.0 6.24550561798 112% => OK
Article: 8.0 4.99550561798 160% => OK
Subordination: 9.0 3.10617977528 290% => Less adverbial clause wanted.
Conjunction: 6.0 1.77640449438 338% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 6.0 4.38483146067 137% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 18.0 20.2370786517 89% => OK
Sentence length: 27.0 23.0359550562 117% => OK
Sentence length SD: 63.656388544 60.3974514979 105% => OK
Chars per sentence: 134.277777778 118.986275619 113% => OK
Words per sentence: 27.0555555556 23.4991977007 115% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.27777777778 5.21951772744 159% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.97078651685 101% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 7.80617977528 13% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 15.0 10.2758426966 146% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 1.0 5.13820224719 19% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.83258426966 41% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.177330228492 0.243740707755 73% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0504805938065 0.0831039109588 61% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0546816319069 0.0758088955206 72% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.102603774622 0.150359130593 68% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0459213065577 0.0667264976115 69% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.5 14.1392134831 110% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 44.07 48.8420337079 90% => OK
smog_index: 11.2 7.92365168539 141% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.1743820225 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.78 12.1639044944 97% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.74 8.38706741573 104% => OK
difficult_words: 116.0 100.480337079 115% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 15.0 11.8971910112 126% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.8 11.2143820225 114% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.7820224719 102% => OK
What are above readability scores?
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Rates: 79.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.75 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.