“The best way for a society to prepare its young people for leadership in government, industry, or other fields is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, not competition.”
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons or examples that could be used to challenge your position.
When questioning the best system for preparing the future generation for leadership positions, it is important to consider the impacts of a society' focus on instilling a sense of cooperation versus competition. The prompt suggests that the ideal method for society to prepare its young people for leadership is by instilling in them a sense of cooperation, rather than competition. I strongly agree with this statement for two reasons.
Instilling a sense of competition from a young age can lead to a number of consequences that can harm the mental health of young people. For example, in South Korea, where students are encouraged to aim for perfect exam scores and forced into cram-schools to better compete against their peers, there has been an increasing number of suicide attempts over the past decades. Moreover, there have been many documented instances of increased bullying within schools that publically display student rankings— in an attempt to foster more drive in the students with low rankings. Although a sense of competition is encouraged to prepare students for an increasingly competitive job market, there are severe consequences to the students' mental well-being that can result from this competitive environment.
Moreover, teamwork is an important skill that is critical for young people to learn in order to be sucessful in a leadership position within a myriad of professions. For example, in physicians must work in tandem with other healthcare workers to provide a high quality of care for their patients. Although physicians are able to diagnose and determine a plan of action for administering care to the patient, it is up to the nursing staff to execute this plan and ensure that the patient is receiving the correct doseage of his or her medications at the correct time of day. Similarily, in veterinary medicine, it is important for veterinarians guide their clients to make sure that the patient receives the care that they require. For instance, as animals are unable to independently take their medications, it is important that the veterinarian effectively communicates with their client with one another and work together to ensure that the medication is appropriately administered to the animal.
In essence, it is important for society to place emphasis on fostering a sense of cooperation in young people to better prepare them for positions of leadership as teamwork is a critical skill required in a multitude of professions. Moreover, although competition can help instill drive in some individuals, this benefit does not outweigh the potential consequences.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 9 2
No. of Sentences: 14 15
No. of Words: 414 350
No. of Characters: 2156 1500
No. of Different Words: 207 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.511 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.208 4.6
Word Length SD: 3.019 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 168 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 135 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 98 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 67 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 29.571 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 9.818 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.429 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.337 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.563 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.113 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5