An increasing trend nowadays is for young adults to play computer games some people say this is negative development Discuss and give your opinion

Emerging adults are increasing spending time playing video games which is a growing trend nowadays. However, some argue that this is a harmful phenomenon. While video games can undoubtedly be taken as a hobby to spend their leisure time trying out something new in technology, I believe that in some instances things can get out of hand, lowering the child's learning and attention span and even cause serious damage to their health.

On the one hand, electronic games can cause behavioural changes and lower their academic performances. Additionally, the adults can become more violent and arrogant, expressing behaviours as shown by the games' characters, and lead to family, relationship, and money problems. They will also not be competent to find jobs to support themselves and their families. An addict, for instance, will always think of gaming even when there are more important things to consider, like studying, working etc. As a result, socialising would be restricted and they would underdeveloped personalities compared to others. A blanket ban on video games would draw the attention of the children making it a positive impact on the future generation.

On the other hand, playing electronic arcade games would present lethargic nature within one. Furthermore, too much screen time for the whole day could cause the person to become lazy and therefore gain weight. For example, research done by Oxford University showed that about 70% of the adults who are addicted to games have been diagnosed with serious weight gains making them suffer from extreme weight-related issues. Staying in one place, stuck to a computer screen would cause the body's metabolism to lower and cause side effects such as heart diseases and strokes at an early age. Restricting these options is the best option to prevent negativity.

In conclusion, while playing on the computer or TV screen can be used as a leisure activity, drawbacks such as adjusting a person's mindset and causing extreme diseases at younger ages should be taken into account while playing these technological games. It is recommended that the adults should be specified certain times to play video games and then focus on essential items, so both attention and addiction would be solved.

Votes
Average: 8.9 (1 vote)
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 7, column 124, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'persons'' or 'person's'?
Suggestion: persons'; person's
...activity, drawbacks such as adjusting a persons mindset and causing extreme diseases at...
^^^^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, furthermore, however, if, so, then, therefore, while, for example, for instance, in conclusion, such as, as a result, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 15.0 13.1623246493 114% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 7.85571142285 204% => Less auxiliary verb wanted.
Conjunction : 15.0 10.4138276553 144% => OK
Relative clauses : 7.0 7.30460921844 96% => OK
Pronoun: 18.0 24.0651302605 75% => OK
Preposition: 38.0 41.998997996 90% => OK
Nominalization: 6.0 8.3376753507 72% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 1896.0 1615.20841683 117% => OK
No of words: 363.0 315.596192385 115% => OK
Chars per words: 5.22314049587 5.12529762239 102% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.3649236973 4.20363070211 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.75135043102 2.80592935109 98% => OK
Unique words: 217.0 176.041082164 123% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.597796143251 0.561755894193 106% => OK
syllable_count: 583.2 506.74238477 115% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.60771543086 100% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 5.43587174349 55% => OK
Article: 3.0 2.52805611222 119% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 2.0 0.809619238477 247% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 4.0 4.76152304609 84% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 16.0721442886 100% => OK
Sentence length: 22.0 20.2975951904 108% => OK
Sentence length SD: 62.2153204102 49.4020404114 126% => OK
Chars per sentence: 118.5 106.682146367 111% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.6875 20.7667163134 109% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.8125 7.06120827912 125% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.38176352705 91% => OK
Language errors: 1.0 5.01903807615 20% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 8.0 8.67935871743 92% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 7.0 3.9879759519 176% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 1.0 3.4128256513 29% => More facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.162780637166 0.244688304435 67% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0559337900242 0.084324248473 66% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0468471113157 0.0667982634062 70% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.100972087949 0.151304729494 67% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0233744067812 0.056905535591 41% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.5 13.0946893788 111% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.15 50.2224549098 98% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.44779559118 118% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 11.3001002004 105% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.29 12.4159519038 107% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.16 8.58950901804 107% => OK
difficult_words: 102.0 78.4519038076 130% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.5 9.78957915832 117% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.8 10.1190380762 107% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 10.7795591182 111% => OK
What are above readability scores?

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Rates: 89.8876404494 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 8.0 Out of 9
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.