"An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds represent the most frequently given reason for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid—a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil—as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism."
The argument presented is generally a good one. However, there are ways it can be improved. The author claims that daily use of Ichthaid-a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil is a good way to prevent cold and lower absenteeism, due to his underlying assumption that increased consumption of fish prevents cold and therefore lower absenteeism, which was shown in a study conducted in nearby East Meria.
Firstly, the author implies that the low rate at which people do see the doctor at East Meria is due to the high consumption of fish in that area. There could be other possible reasons which could lead to the people of East Meria visiting the doctor very few times a year. These reasons might include; proper hygiene practices carried out by the people of East Meria, which would definitely prevent the spread of microorganisms such as corona virus or influenza virus which have been implicated as causative agents of cold, thereby hindering the spread of the above named viruses from one person to another, or high immune system of the people of East Meria which would prevent even those who are infected from coming down with cold. Such evidence would weaken the claim of the author that the reason the people of East meria does see the doctor few times a year is as a result of the high consumption of fish by its populace.
Secondly, the author talked about the study been carried out at a specific area but didn’t mention the scope and validity of the survey. The sample number used in the survey might have been very low, for example involving just two people, or sampling method used might not have been efficient, thereby reducing the reliability of the survey. Such evidence would weaken the authors claim that people of East Meria visit the doctor very few times, for the treatment of cold.
Thirdly, the underlying assumption of the author is that the daily use of Ichthaid would prevent cold and absenteeism, but he provides no concrete evidence to bolster his claim and convince the readers. Moreover, it wasn’t stated that the specific nutritional content that prevents the people of East Meria from getting cold is contained particularly in the fish oil. It might be found in other places of the fish such as the egg or fin, which contains very little to no amount of oil. Therefore, the daily intake of Ichthaid, for the prevention of cold and absenteeism would be baseless.
Therefore, I believe that the argument isn’t sufficient and doesn’t totally provide answers to all the questions required to make it a good a decision.
Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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2021-02-23 | deadFish | 78 | view |
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2021-08-04 | Anirudha Balaji Shirsikar | 65 | view |
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argument 1 -- OK
argument 2 -- Not OK. You can apply the content of the paragraph to any survey.
Correct way: accept the study or survey to be true, then try to find a loophole.
argument 3 -- OK
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 443 350
No. of Characters: 2074 1500
No. of Different Words: 195 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.588 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.682 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.449 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 140 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 96 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 66 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 38 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 29.533 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 16.276 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.8 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.369 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.616 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.125 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5