Write a narrative essay about someone or something that influenced you.
Seeking out someone who has many great characteristics that we can admire is not a trivial task. Basically, considering celebrities as models to grow up and develop in the same way is not a strange way. Young people also let their idols affect their childhood and form part of their personality. I am not an exception case as well. BTS gradually became my idol, my personality, and my life. The very three things that influence me a lot are their passion, perseverance or determination and their love.
The characteristic that appeals to me most is their passion. I had known them for the first time since I was fourteen years old, but I did not pay much attention to them because they were just debuting in a small company, while many other well-known groups were debuting more than five years earlier in the three biggest entertainment companies at that time, namely YG, JYP, and SM. I absolutely ignored them until they got a huge prize at a big ceremony in 2016 (three years after). I began to learn their information first-hand the first time and knew what they had been through. Making their debut in a small company presented them with numerous difficulties and challenges. They did not have much funding to develop their musical products. Thus, they had to do something on their own, like delivering free tickets for their concert in a foreign country like the USA, staying in a small rented house, and filming music videos by using their staff’s cars. Or the most desperate thing is being cut off their performance on TV. Eventually, they are still alive and even develop in a spectacular way. The only thing that can be explained in their case is that they have a passion. They lived with their colossal passion and did not let anyone do harm to it or make them less passionate. Their first performance had only one audience and they still performed. They appreciate every chance to stand on stage, they appreciate everyone who loves their music, and they appreciate their dream, their passion. Even now, when they have become a world-wide group, they still keep their initiative passion.
The second reason that made me fall in love with this boy group is not because of their beauty, but their perseverance. They practiced up to eighteen hours a day. Besides, they gave out their products regularly. They were not frustrated because of other people’s opinions about their outlook, their music, or their origins. Instead, they focused on their dream and were patient with it. They ignored many stories about plagiarism. They did not stop to explain anything. They kept moving forward with their own minds and let time explain the rest. Being loyal to their passion and their dreams helps them to be more perseverant in conquering any arduous task in their life.
The final thing that makes me love BTS is their love and their care. Their songs are not only for Koreans but for people from all over the world. They spread their love and their sharing to every country in one language. People assume that they love BTS songs and the meaning of the songs more. When I listen to their songs, I feel like my soul is being appeased. They have been through a period of difficult times, so they know how hard it is to overcome. Songs are written to share with listeners their rough times and aim for the good things in life. Many introverted and depressed people find new paths when they listen to BTS music.
To summarize what I have been discussing above, I have to acknowledge that BTS plays a huge role in my life. They give me the inspiration to continue my dream. Gradually, their personalities form in my mind. They teach me how to love everyone and spread the love. I know how to conquer my own difficulties by focusing on my passion and being perseverant all the time.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2021-09-22 | huynhthinhu | 43 | view |
| 2021-09-22 | nguyenphuongngocnhi | 11 | view |
| 2021-09-22 | Nguyễn Thị Cẩm Tươi | 11 | view |
| 2021-09-21 | tuthilantuong | 48 | view |
| 2021-09-21 | giabaohuynhvo | 88 | view |
- IELTS essay The qualities that make someone admirable 11
- Some people think reading stories in books is better than watching TV or playing computer games for children To what extent do you agree or disagree 73
- Write a narrative essay about someone or something that influenced you 11
- In many countries people are concerned about the number of children who are overweight What do you think are the causes of this What solutions can you suggest 56
- IELTS essay The qualities that make someone admirable 11
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 482, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
...big ceremony in 2016 three years after. I began to learn their information first-...
^
Line 2, column 1076, Rule ID: IN_A_X_MANNER[1]
Message: Consider replacing "in a spectacular way" with adverb for "spectacular"; eg, "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
..., they are still alive and even develop in a spectacular way. The only thing that can be explained i...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 470, Rule ID: ENGLISH_WORD_REPEAT_BEGINNING_RULE
Message: Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Reword the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
... They did not stop to explain anything. They kept moving forward with their own mind...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, but, first, if, look, second, so, still, thus, well, while, i feel, in the same way
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 27.0 13.1623246493 205% => Less to be verbs wanted.
Auxiliary verbs: 2.0 7.85571142285 25% => OK
Conjunction : 29.0 10.4138276553 278% => Less conjunction wanted
Relative clauses : 15.0 7.30460921844 205% => Less relative clauses wanted (maybe 'which' is over used).
Pronoun: 114.0 24.0651302605 474% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 77.0 41.998997996 183% => OK
Nominalization: 12.0 8.3376753507 144% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 3125.0 1615.20841683 193% => OK
No of words: 665.0 315.596192385 211% => Less content wanted.
Chars per words: 4.6992481203 5.12529762239 92% => OK
Fourth root words length: 5.07814867018 4.20363070211 121% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.51579711381 2.80592935109 90% => OK
Unique words: 318.0 176.041082164 181% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.478195488722 0.561755894193 85% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 938.7 506.74238477 185% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.4 1.60771543086 87% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 31.0 5.43587174349 570% => Less pronouns wanted as sentence beginning.
Article: 5.0 2.52805611222 198% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.10420841683 143% => OK
Conjunction: 8.0 0.809619238477 988% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 3.0 4.76152304609 63% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 42.0 16.0721442886 261% => Too many sentences.
Sentence length: 15.0 20.2975951904 74% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively short.
Sentence length SD: 48.591341623 49.4020404114 98% => OK
Chars per sentence: 74.4047619048 106.682146367 70% => OK
Words per sentence: 15.8333333333 20.7667163134 76% => OK
Discourse Markers: 2.33333333333 7.06120827912 33% => More transition words/phrases wanted.
Paragraphs: 5.0 4.38176352705 114% => OK
Language errors: 3.0 5.01903807615 60% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 27.0 8.67935871743 311% => Less positive sentences wanted.
Sentences with negative sentiment : 5.0 3.9879759519 125% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 10.0 3.4128256513 293% => Less facts, knowledge or examples wanted.
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.017372502378 0.244688304435 7% => The similarity between the topic and the content is low.
Sentence topic coherence: 0.00609321619064 0.084324248473 7% => Sentence topic similarity is low.
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0174725594759 0.0667982634062 26% => Sentences are similar to each other.
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.0138587163161 0.151304729494 9% => Maybe some paragraphs are off the topic.
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0153839829292 0.056905535591 27% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 8.6 13.0946893788 66% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 73.17 50.2224549098 146% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.44779559118 42% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 6.8 11.3001002004 60% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 9.68 12.4159519038 78% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.23 8.58950901804 84% => OK
difficult_words: 120.0 78.4519038076 153% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 6.5 9.78957915832 66% => OK
gunning_fog: 8.0 10.1190380762 79% => OK
text_standard: 7.0 10.7795591182 65% => The average readability is low. Need to imporve the language.
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
It is not exactly right on the topic in the view of e-grader. Maybe there is a wrong essay topic.
Rates: 11.2359550562 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 0.67 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.