Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle. Both schools and parents are responsible for solving this problem.
As the world is changing, children are easily influenced by plenty of unhealthy activities. They are more likely to satisfy their willing without taking into consideration whether it leads to dire consequence or not. Toward this matter, the majority of parents should be aware of children’s habits as they play an important role in terms of educating their children to concern about a healthy life and render lots of advice before children decide to do a particular activity. In addition, schools are another authority to persuade students to spend their time taking enough exercise, like extracurricular activity or charity community.
Parents seem to have a lack of awareness to their children’s lifestyle such obesity. Admittedly, parents should pay more attention to prevent children not to consume a poor diet or have such a sedentary habit. A study of the University of the Basque Country in Spain shows that bad eating habit, ingestion of alcohol and sedentary lifestyle are all unhealthy life habits that are already being detected in early adolescence and that are especially predominant amongst women and young people between the ages of 19 and 26. Therefore, parents are responsible to avoid giving the children unhealthy food which can cause a great risk of developing certain cancers in the future. Also, parents must encourage them to be more active in many sorts of pivotal events outside rather than just staying at home.
The primary reason why schools become the second factor influencing children’s lifestyle is that most of children spend their time in schools. To exemplify, a great deal of schools in Indonesia nowadays have a regulation for students to study six days in a week, and they obligate students to do several extracurricular activities and social action on Saturday or even Sunday. Children eventually can improve a wide range of skills which bring benefits for them and this is one of schools’ efforts to fill their leisure time. Consequently, few schools not only teach students by a large number of subjects, but also educate students’ behavior to face destructive influences which exist in the world.
The aforementioned evidence provides that although parents have an obligation to nurture children so that the children are accustomed to healthy living habits, schools also can affect children’s mind to use their time properly. It is imperative that children must accept all kinds of beneficial suggestion from both parents and schools so as to obtain the greatful life.
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The aforementioned evidence provides that
The aforementioned evidence provides the idea that
Sentence: It is imperative that children must accept all kinds of beneficial suggestion from both parents and schools so as to obtain the greatful life.
Error: greatful Suggestion: grateful
flaws:
Need to polish sentences. for example, Try to use less pronouns or not to use pronouns (like 'It, I, They, We, You...') as the subject of a sentence.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 6.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 405 350
No. of Characters: 2073 1500
No. of Different Words: 232 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.486 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.119 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.749 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 166 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 128 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 84 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 50 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 27 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 10.405 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.467 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.343 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.541 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.074 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5