Leisure to Create Happiness.
Our job plays an important role in our lives, even it is said that a person income might define his or her social status. This is an interesting topic that will be reflected different for each person. The concept of each one will depend upon factors such as social, cultural and even educational. When it comes to me, I claim that a person's job is the main aspect to be happy for some reasons that I will develop in the next paragraphs.
In the first place, if one earns a good salary then one might enjoy much more than others who don't make the same money. Because in our society, people are characterized for the money that he or she possesses. Therefore, those with money have the chance to buy leisure like expensive cars and clothes, this plight will bring the attention of others. Also, people will be interested on being his or her friend. For instance, in my country Dominican Republic, professional baseball players have a huge fortune, this not only make them popular but also they enjoy many things that others cannot.
In addition, If a person has a good job for sure will have a interesting social life. As a matter of fact, wealthy people don't like to interact with people who don't have their same economic position. Thus, rich people enjoy their social lives due to the fact that they make expensive parties with friends and families and just to bring the attention, wealthy people show others that they are really rich, contrary a person with a low salary cannot do it. But, this is only a minor aspect about the happiness that a rich person might create with their money, furthermore wealthy people can travel around the world and meet beautiful places.
Even though, there are many people who don't care the money, rather they prefer to be more social because they enjoy to interact with people and simple things. For a sample, my father likes to go to the countryside and spend time with the animals apart of people and the noise of the town, my father says that he feels relax when he is there. So, each individual is different.
To sum up, for the reasons stated above, I outright support the fact that a good job where one can make a good money is more influencing for our happiness than our social life because with money one can experience expensive activities, and interact with people who also are rich. Finally with a good job also one might have a good social life.
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a person income
a person's income
will be reflected different for each person.
will be reflected differently for each person.
this not only make them popular but also they enjoy many things that others cannot.
Description: 'Not only...but also' is not used properly. can you re-write this sentence?
If a person has a good job for sure will have a interesting social life.
If a person has a good job for sure he will have an interesting social life.
Sentence: For a sample, my father likes to go to the countryside and spend time with the animals apart of people and the noise of the town, my father says that he feels relax when he is there.
Description: A verb, present tense, 3rd person singular is not usually followed by a verb, base: uninflected present, imperative or infinitive
Suggestion: Refer to feels and relax
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Words: 438 while No. of Different Words: 207
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 21 in 30
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 5 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 19 15
No. of Words: 438 350
No. of Characters: 1940 1500
No. of Different Words: 207 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.575 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.429 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.231 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 124 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 67 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 43 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 29 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.053 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 12.063 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.579 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.32 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.578 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.123 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 5