The graph shows four countries of residence of overseas students in Australia.
The graph illustrates a number of international students from four countries studied in Australia for the period of 1982 to 2000. The units are measured in a 1000 number of students.
Overall, during the given periods, the number of students who studied in Australia has increased.
Indonesia showed the highest number of students who have studied in Australia for the 18years.
Within the graph, there were below 10 Malaysian students in 1982. Whereas a number of students, who were from other three countries, showed about 2 students in that year. A number of students from Malaysia showed a steady increase until 1994. Then it started to rise, which number reached at close to 10 in 1996. After 1996, the number of students fluctuated in between of 10 and below 20.
Hongkong and Singapore had the same number of students of around 1 until 1987. While the number of Singaporean students stayed the same in 1988 as of the number from 1987, the number of Hongkong students started to increase. Hongkong students increased to around 8 in a year of 1988 while a number for Singaporean students was stayed at similar number as of 1987. This figure started to pick up in 90s of showing a steady increase to below 20 in 2000.
A number of students from Indonesia was around 2 in 1988. Within 10 years of period, it rose rapidly to about 25 indonesian students. After 1998, there was a slight drop by about 5 students, then it picked up its trend to reach at below about 25 students by 2000.
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Then it started to rise, which number reached at close to 10 in 1996.
Description: check books how to use 'which'
fluctuated in between of 10 and below 20.
fluctuated between 10 to 20.
This figure started to pick up in 90s of showing a steady increase to below 20 in 2000.
Description: 'This figure' is not clear. for which country or region?
Sentence: Hongkong and Singapore had the same number of students of around 1 until 1987.
Description: The token of is not usually followed by a preposition
Suggestion: Refer to of and around
Sentence: Hongkong students increased to around 8 in a year of 1988 while a number for Singaporean students was stayed at similar number as of 1987.
Description: The token to is not usually followed by a preposition
Suggestion: Refer to to and around
Sentence: This figure started to pick up in 90s of showing a steady increase to below 20 in 2000.
Description: The token to is not usually followed by a preposition
Suggestion: Refer to to and below
Sentence: Within 10 years of period, it rose rapidly to about 25 indonesian students.
Description: The token to is not usually followed by a preposition
Suggestion: Refer to to and about
flaws:
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Words: 262 200
Write the essay in 20 minutes. You don't just go details, need more comparison and contrast.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 5.5 out of 9
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 7 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 10
No. of Words: 262 200
No. of Characters: 1193 1000
No. of Different Words: 106 100
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.023 4.0
Average Word Length: 4.553 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.489 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 92 60
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 59 50
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 43 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 17 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 16.375 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.11 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.312 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.47 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.672 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.207 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 6 4