Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? People benefit more from traveling in their own country than from traveling to foreign countries.
There is no shortage of debates that traveling a lot of places help to relax in our tribulated world. While some people prefer travel mostly intheir own country, others usually go to foreign countries. Personally, I disagree with the idea that spending vacation in other countries is better than traveling my homeland.
To begin with, going to new countries, give a chance of meeting various cultures, which give us broad perspectives understanding world. Drawing my personal experience, when I went to the United States even within a couple of days I met plenty of people who were from different countries. After communicating with them I had better knowledge about their cultural events, I learnt some interesting facts about their languages. Even one of them were from Iran and I was suprised when he talked about their traditional holidays which are very similar with my country. Furthermore, althought my purpose was only traveling and relaxing within a few days, I learnt some new invested technology about my specialty, which inspired me to talk to my clinical deparment about bringing them to my country as well. Therefore, traveling different countries could gained us improved knowledge and wider perspectives rather than staying in your own country which has probably same stage of development.
Secondly, being in differnt countries enlarge your international network. When native people of that country encounter with a foreigner, they were mostly interest with this person for obtaining information from his country, and hey know that foreigners do not have a lot of familiar circumstances around them, they try to help them, That is why, it makes it easier to communicate with them. I have to admit that my opinion on this matter has been profoundly influenced my own experience. When I traveled the city of my country, in the restuarants waiters and natives of that city sometimes were not willing to tell about their cities. However in Antalya, one city of Turkey, when ordinary people heard our accent, they started to talk to us interesting facts about there and most famous places and most reliable transportation wways within city. In addition to this, I made a lot of new friends while getting information from them. Therefore, I gained new connections from various countries.
In the light of aforementioned reasons, I strongly believe that traveling to foreign countries cause to discover new places, new cultures, improving person's world knowledge and enlarging network internationally.
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- TOEFL T P O 12 Integrated Writing Task 3
Comments
Essay evaluations by e-grader
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 848, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'gain'
Suggestion: gain
...re, traveling different countries could gained us improved knowledge and wider perspec...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 899, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...mproved knowledge and wider perspectives rather than staying in your own country ...
^^
Line 3, column 635, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...not willing to tell about their cities. However in Antalya, one city of Turkey, when or...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 102, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'discovering'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'cause' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: discovering
...at traveling to foreign countries cause to discover new places, new cultures, improving per...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
furthermore, however, if, second, secondly, so, therefore, well, while, in addition, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 9.8082437276 10% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 63.0 52.1666666667 121% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2112.0 1977.66487455 107% => OK
No of words: 403.0 407.700716846 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.24069478908 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48049772903 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91673175001 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 220.0 212.727598566 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.545905707196 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 647.1 618.680645161 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 64.806445918 48.9658058833 132% => OK
Chars per sentence: 124.235294118 100.406767564 124% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.7058823529 20.6045352989 115% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.76470588235 5.45110844103 106% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.281613151126 0.236089414692 119% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0941629565542 0.076458572812 123% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0597051384734 0.0737576698707 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.187603242816 0.150856017488 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0514635177198 0.0645574589148 80% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 11.7677419355 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 58.1214874552 83% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.41 10.9000537634 123% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.09 8.01818996416 113% => OK
difficult_words: 110.0 86.8835125448 127% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 848, Rule ID: DID_BASEFORM[1]
Message: The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: 'gain'
Suggestion: gain
...re, traveling different countries could gained us improved knowledge and wider perspec...
^^^^^^
Line 2, column 899, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...mproved knowledge and wider perspectives rather than staying in your own country ...
^^
Line 3, column 635, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: However,
...not willing to tell about their cities. However in Antalya, one city of Turkey, when or...
^^^^^^^
Line 4, column 102, Rule ID: ALLOW_TO[1]
Message: Did you mean 'discovering'? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'cause' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
Suggestion: discovering
...at traveling to foreign countries cause to discover new places, new cultures, improving per...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
furthermore, however, if, second, secondly, so, therefore, well, while, in addition, to begin with
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 12.0 15.1003584229 79% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 1.0 9.8082437276 10% => OK
Conjunction : 8.0 13.8261648746 58% => More conjunction wanted.
Relative clauses : 18.0 11.0286738351 163% => OK
Pronoun: 59.0 43.0788530466 137% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 63.0 52.1666666667 121% => OK
Nominalization: 9.0 8.0752688172 111% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2112.0 1977.66487455 107% => OK
No of words: 403.0 407.700716846 99% => OK
Chars per words: 5.24069478908 4.8611393121 108% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.48049772903 4.48103885553 100% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.91673175001 2.67179642975 109% => OK
Unique words: 220.0 212.727598566 103% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.545905707196 0.524837075471 104% => OK
syllable_count: 647.1 618.680645161 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.51630824373 106% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 12.0 9.59856630824 125% => OK
Article: 0.0 3.08781362007 0% => OK
Subordination: 6.0 3.51792114695 171% => OK
Conjunction: 1.0 1.86738351254 54% => OK
Preposition: 5.0 4.94265232975 101% => OK
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 17.0 20.6003584229 83% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 23.0 20.1344086022 114% => OK
Sentence length SD: 64.806445918 48.9658058833 132% => OK
Chars per sentence: 124.235294118 100.406767564 124% => OK
Words per sentence: 23.7058823529 20.6045352989 115% => OK
Discourse Markers: 5.76470588235 5.45110844103 106% => OK
Paragraphs: 4.0 4.53405017921 88% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 5.5376344086 72% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 14.0 11.8709677419 118% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 0.0 3.85842293907 0% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 3.0 4.88709677419 61% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.281613151126 0.236089414692 119% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0941629565542 0.076458572812 123% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0597051384734 0.0737576698707 81% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.187603242816 0.150856017488 124% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0514635177198 0.0645574589148 80% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.1 11.7677419355 128% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 48.13 58.1214874552 83% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 6.10430107527 144% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 12.3 10.1575268817 121% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 13.41 10.9000537634 123% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 9.09 8.01818996416 113% => OK
difficult_words: 110.0 86.8835125448 127% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 11.0 10.002688172 110% => OK
gunning_fog: 11.2 10.0537634409 111% => OK
text_standard: 11.0 10.247311828 107% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Better to have 5 paragraphs with 3 arguments. And try always support/against one side but compare two sides, like this:
para 1: introduction
para 2: reason 1. address both of the views presented for reason 1
para 3: reason 2. address both of the views presented for reason 2
para 4: reason 3. address both of the views presented for reason 3
para 5: conclusion.
So how to find out those reasons. There is a formula:
reasons == advantages or
reasons == disadvantages
for example, we can always apply 'save time', 'save/make money', 'find a job', 'make friends', 'get more information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
or we can apply 'waste time', 'waste money', 'no job', 'make bad friends', 'get bad information' as reasons to all essay/speaking topics.
Rates: 76.6666666667 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 23.0 Out of 30
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.