There is no doubt that technological advances have vastly affected humans' lives. In this regard, computers are the most widespread technology that are utilized in different ways and have several advantages and disadvantages. An important role of computers is for playing games. This often brings up a controversial question: Does the merits of a computer game outweighs its demerits? In this regards, some people are inclined toward the opinion that children should not be allowed to play computer games whereas others hold the opposite perspective, believing that computer games are good choice to amuse children. In my humble opinion, disadvantages of computer games weigh more than advantages because children need to have physical health and to improve their mental and social abilities, in addition to be amused. In the following paragraphs, I will elaborate on my viewpoint for persuading children not to play computer games.
The first reason that immediately comes to mind is that children need physical health. That is to say, children should exercise and have mobility to be healthy. For example, a child who sits in front of the computer screen for a long time, his eyes will be damaged and no more fat will burn which, in turn, will cause a serious obesity. Obesity is the main reason for several diseases, such as heart diseases. In fact, prolonged sitting in front of the computers has extreme and irreparable damages on the children and that is why children should be convinced to play computer games in a limited way.
Another equally important reason is that computer games hinder creativity and other mental abilities in children. Most widespread popular computer games among children are spreading violence and aggressive behavior rather than improving children's mind. An important research results in the psychology department of our university indicates that computer games have negative effects, such as addiction, aggression, poor educational performance, and introversion. Therefore, computer games inhibit children to reflect on their tasks and hinder them to use their creativity to make new ideas.
The last but not least reason is that children are going to be a member of a society in the future and they are going to need social abilities. In fact, computer games make children introversive - as mentioned in the previous paragraph. Children should interact with their friends rather than playing alone to improve their social skills. Psychologists assert that children who have more friends in their childhood will face with better job opportunities and will succeed in their professional life as well. The more the social skills of a child improve, the more successful the job interviews will be as they grow. Hence, computer games harm children's future life.
Decisively, if one assesses the disadvantages of computer games and their harmful effects on children, one soon realizes that it is a total waste of time that will not benefit children. In fact, irrecoverable physical, mental, and social effects of computer games on children outweighs the amusement aspect of the computer games. Therefore, parents should discourage their children from squandering their time with computer games.
- TPO 18 – Independent: A/D? Students are more influenced by their teachers than by their friends. 70
- TOEFL Sample essay : integrated essay from TPO5 90
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- TOEFL Sample essay : integrated essay from TPO7 80
- Independent TOEFL essay - TPO 5: Agree or disagree : People today spend too much time on personal enjoyment - Doing things they like to do - rather than doing things they should do. 90
Sentence: In fact, computer games make children introversive - as mentioned in the previous paragraph.
Error: introversive Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
No. of Words: 509 350 //Write the essay in 30 minutes. The introduction paragraph is too long.
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 26 in 30
Category: Very Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 1 2
No. of Sentences: 25 15
No. of Words: 509 350
No. of Characters: 2658 1500
No. of Different Words: 234 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.75 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.222 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.736 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 206 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 163 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 124 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 65 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.36 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.342 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.68 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.343 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.505 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.098 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5