GRE Argument:
The following appeared in a memo from the mayor of Brindleburg to the city council.
"Two years ago, the town of Seaside Vista opened a new municipal golf course and resort hotel. Since then, the Seaside Vista Tourism Board has reported a 20% increase in visitors. In addition, local banks reported a steep rise in the number of new business loan applications they received this year. The amount of tax money collected by Seaside Vista has also increased, allowing the town to announce plans to improve Seaside Vista's roads and bridges. We recommend building a similar golf course and resort hotel in Brindleburg. We predict that this project will generate additional tax revenue that the city can use to fund much-needed public improvements."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The memo states that the golf course and resort hotel in Seaside Vista have benefited abundantly and even facilitated the prosperity of relative business, which means bank and tax revenue. The author argues that opening a similar golf course and resort hotel in Brindleburg could also gain copious interest. The view of the author might hold water. However, there are some issues render this view unconvincing.
First of all, the author mentions that running the golf course and resort hotel in Seaside Vista gain a large amount of profit, and so will the same thing happen in Brindleburg. Nevertheless, these are no information about the similarities and differences between Brindleburg and Seaside Vista. It is possible that Brindleburg has no spectacles and wonderful natural resource for visitors to take a break. In other words, there might be a wholly distinct situation in Brindleburg and then processing a new golf course and resort hotel might not receive ample visitors and profits.
Secondly, the memo contends that the bank as well as tax revenue are also increased with the aid of the golf course and the resort hotel. Nonetheless, the loan applications are received this year, but not the same as the years which beginning the golf course and resort hotel. Besides, the author does not cite which year that the tax revenue is high. Probably, there might be other projects promoted by the local government to bolster local tourism and then bring the profits to golf course, resort hotel, and other businesses. Therefore, it is hard to accurately judge that the golf course and resort hotel exactly provide profits to other local businesses.
Finally, the author points out that the tax income earned by Seaside Vista is going to apply on public infrastructures, like roads and bridges. Notwithstanding, Brindleburg might have higher tax income and more prosperous business development than Seaside Vista. Brindleburg might already have lavish tax revenue to revise and maintain their public infrastructure. Therefore, managing a new golf course and resort hotel might not offer a better profit than the amount that they have now. The economic condition has to be investigated thoroughly before starting a new business.
To sum up, the suggestion in the memo needs some information to reinforce its stance. Although the author offer several reasons, the proposal should not be accepted until the information: the similarities and differences between the two cities, the detail time about profits, and the economy survey of the both two cities have be substantiated.
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Sentence: Although the author offer several reasons, the proposal should not be accepted until the information: the similarities and differences between the two cities, the detail time about profits, and the economy survey of the both two cities have be substantiated.
Description: A verb 'to have', uninflected present tense, infinitive or is not usually followed by a verb 'to be', infinitive or imperative
Suggestion: Refer to have and be
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argument 1 -- need more arguments: suppose they have similar natural resource for visitors, it works 'Two years ago', it doesn't mean it will work for nowadays.
argument 2 -- OK
argument 3 -- more: first of all, it may not generate additional tax revenue; second, suppose it can generate additional tax revenue, it may be not enough for the public improvements.
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.0 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 18 15
No. of Words: 415 350
No. of Characters: 2116 1500
No. of Different Words: 192 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.513 4.7
Average Word Length: 5.099 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.663 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 153 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 102 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 69 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 23.056 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.541 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.722 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.364 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.58 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.112 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5