The following is a recommendation from the Board of Directors of Monarch Books.
"We recommend that Monarch Books open a café in its store. Monarch, having been in business at the same location for more than twenty years, has a large customer base because it is known for its wide selection of books on all subjects. Clearly, opening the café would attract more customers. Space could be made for the café by discontinuing the children's book section, which will probably become less popular given that the most recent national census indicated a significant decline in the percentage of the population under age ten. Opening a café will allow Monarch to attract more customers and better compete with Regal Books, which recently opened its own café."
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The recommendation proposes to a publication's book store to reduce one of their sections in order to erect a café at the book store. The recommender bases this idea in the assumption that a café will attract some extra customers and buttress the publication in competing with their rivals. However, there seems to be some missing data that may influence making such decision.
According to the paragraph, the Monarch Book is popular because of the diversity of its book titles on different subjects. Nevertheless, the recommender asserts that the number of customers will increase if the store opens a café. In order to support such presumption, there should be some objective data that shows a number of people who usually do not go there, will change their mind in case of having a chance to spend some time in café. It is not implausible that most of the possible customers of Monarch Book are indifferent to the so-called idea. Hence, opening a café may not add a significant number to their customers.
Furthermore, the paragraph suggests that the required space for the café can be provided by closing the children's books section based on the notion that there is decline in their popularity. However, it is indicated that diversity of sections in Monarch Book is the prominent alluring factor that makes its good reputation amongst customers. Making such decision should be in accordance to realistic data about the amount of sells in children's section. Constituting a significant number of Monarch's customers, children should not be ignored; otherwise, the store will lose some customers instead of gaining some.
Finally, the recommendation claims that a peer book store has recently opened a café and in return has attracted some new customers. Considering the short interval that has elapsed from the opening of a café in Regale Book, the writer should include the related statistics that shows there is a tangible increase in people who buy books at the rival store. Moreover, in short time periods, even an increased number of visitors may not guarantee a sustained increase in customers, since it may be due to the attraction of a new option and it's possible to become ordinary after a while.
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Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.055 0.07
Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 4.5 out of 6
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 15 15
No. of Words: 368 350
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No. of Different Words: 174 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.38 4.7
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Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 24.533 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 8.701 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.467 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.361 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.548 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.055 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5