Five years ago Fish Emporium started advertising in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly. Their stores saw sales increase by 15 percent after their ads began appearing in the magazine. The three Fish Emporium stores in Gulf City saw an even greater increase than that. Because Top Dog Pet Stores is based in Gulf City, it seems clear that we should start placing our own ads in Exotic Pets Monthly. If we do so, we will be sure to reverse the recent trend of declining sales and start making a profit again.
Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.
The excerpt recommends that in order to reverse the trend of decreasing sales of the dog in Gulf City, it is a sound option to place the Top Dog Pet Stores in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly. This recommendation rests on series of unsubstantiated evidence and is, therefore, unpersuasive as it stands.
To begin with, the argument fails to provide justification that the sale of dog and the sale of fish are similar. Maybe, the fish is more popular among the people of Gulf City, and people are more inclined to possess the fish rather than the dogs. Or maybe, the cost of fish in Gulf City is more affordable than the cost of the dog. Perhaps, the people spend less money for fish care in comparison to the dog care. As a result, the purchase of fish is a cost-effective option to own a pet. Without providing the sufficient information about the costs of pets, the trend of pet care among the people, it will be an abortive recommendation.
A threshold cause upon which the recommendation relies is that as the Fish Emporium made the profit by advertisement in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly five years ago. The author claims without the warrant that what held true in five years ago will hold faithful today. Even assuming that the sales of dog and fish are identical, the argument is still lacking because it does not provide information to show that the sale and demand have not changed. Since a considerable period of time has passed. Maybe, in the past five years, people's prone toward the pet care have declined and they do not willing to possess a pet anymore. If the argument had presented some clues about the people unaltered incline toward to pet care, then the argument would have been a lot more convincing.
Finally, even assuming that the supply and demand of pet are stable during till now, there is no lucid testimony that the advertisement in the magazine Exotic Pets Monthly will increase the sales and make a profit for the Top Dog Pet Stores. While there is no any concrete statistic of the monthly publishing cost, and its return as a sell for the shops. It is vague conclusion; maybe, the cost of advertisement will be as equal as the monthly earn of shops. In this case, although they eliminate the trend of decreasing sales, they do not make the profit. The argument could have been much clearer if it explicitly stated the cost of advertising and its return as earn to shops. In this condition, the assumption of more profit will be acceptable.
In conclusion, the argument is flawed for the above-mentioned reasons and is, therefore, unconvincing. It could be considerably strengthened if the author clearly mentioned all the relevant facts about the similarity between the sales of fish and dog in Golf City, the steady incline for pet care in there five years, and the monetary status of the company by advertising. Without this information, the argument remains unsubstantiated and open to debate.
- tpo11.1 86
- Improving schools is the most important factor in the successful development of a country 73
- tpo36-integ writing 3
- Do you agree or disagree with following statement Advertising is the most important cause of unhealthy eating habits 47
- Do you agree or disagree with following statement?It is important for governments to protect wild animals and wilderness area for the future. 80
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 2, column 640, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... it will be an abortive recommendation. A threshold cause upon which the recomme...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 453, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “Since” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...t the sale and demand have not changed. Since a considerable period of time has passe...
^^^^^
Line 4, column 474, Rule ID: PERIOD_OF_TIME[1]
Message: Use simply 'period'.
Suggestion: period
... have not changed. Since a considerable period of time has passed. Maybe, in the past five yea...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 6, column 258, Rule ID: NOW[2]
Message: Did you mean 'now' (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
Suggestion: now
... the Top Dog Pet Stores. While there is no any concrete statistic of the monthly p...
^^
Discourse Markers used:
['finally', 'if', 'may', 'so', 'still', 'then', 'therefore', 'while', 'in conclusion', 'as a result', 'to begin with']
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance in Part of Speech:
Nouns: 0.272241992883 0.25644967241 106% => OK
Verbs: 0.128113879004 0.15541462614 82% => OK
Adjectives: 0.0693950177936 0.0836205057962 83% => OK
Adverbs: 0.0533807829181 0.0520304965353 103% => OK
Pronouns: 0.0213523131673 0.0272364105082 78% => OK
Prepositions: 0.144128113879 0.125424944231 115% => OK
Participles: 0.0266903914591 0.0416121511921 64% => OK
Conjunctions: 2.76793650768 2.79052419416 99% => OK
Infinitives: 0.0213523131673 0.026700313972 80% => OK
Particles: 0.0 0.001811407834 0% => OK
Determiners: 0.140569395018 0.113004496875 124% => OK
Modal_auxiliary: 0.0142348754448 0.0255425247493 56% => OK
WH_determiners: 0.00355871886121 0.0127820249294 28% => Some subClauses wanted starting by 'Which, Who, What, Whom, Whose.....'
Vocabulary words and sentences:
No of characters: 2943.0 2731.13054187 108% => OK
No of words: 510.0 446.07635468 114% => OK
Chars per words: 5.77058823529 6.12365571057 94% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.75217629947 4.57801047555 104% => OK
words length more than 5 chars: 0.303921568627 0.378187486979 80% => OK
words length more than 6 chars: 0.217647058824 0.287650121315 76% => OK
words length more than 7 chars: 0.150980392157 0.208842608468 72% => OK
words length more than 8 chars: 0.0921568627451 0.135150697306 68% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.76793650768 2.79052419416 99% => OK
Unique words: 222.0 207.018472906 107% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.435294117647 0.469332199767 93% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
Word variations: 49.7833364213 52.1807786196 95% => OK
How many sentences: 23.0 20.039408867 115% => OK
Sentence length: 22.1739130435 23.2022227129 96% => OK
Sentence length SD: 53.1698068022 57.7814097925 92% => OK
Chars per sentence: 127.956521739 141.986410481 90% => OK
Words per sentence: 22.1739130435 23.2022227129 96% => OK
Discourse Markers: 0.478260869565 0.724660767414 66% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.14285714286 97% => OK
Language errors: 4.0 3.58251231527 112% => OK
Readability: 43.9386189258 51.9672348444 85% => OK
Elegance: 2.18421052632 1.8405768891 119% => OK
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.36209440857 0.441005458295 82% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence: 0.134593917512 0.135418324435 99% => OK
Sentence sentence coherence SD: 0.108530106099 0.0829849096947 131% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence: 0.602578682485 0.58762219726 103% => OK
Sentence paragraph coherence SD: 0.157497112374 0.147661913831 107% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.16165476045 0.193483328276 84% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0977641252969 0.0970749176394 101% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence: 0.585142915963 0.42659136922 137% => OK
Paragraph paragraph coherence SD: 0.0280166386958 0.0774707102158 36% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.279927091829 0.312017818177 90% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0228815012615 0.0698173142475 33% => The ideas may be duplicated in paragraphs.
Task Achievement:
Sentences with positive sentiment : 11.0 8.33743842365 132% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 8.0 6.87684729064 116% => OK
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.82512315271 83% => OK
Positive topic words: 11.0 6.46551724138 170% => OK
Negative topic words: 7.0 5.36822660099 130% => OK
Neutral topic words: 1.0 2.82389162562 35% => OK
Total topic words: 19.0 14.657635468 130% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
---------------------
Rates: 54.17 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.25 Out of 6 -- The score is based on the average performance of 20,000 argument essays. This e-grader is not smart enough to check on arguments.
---------------------
Note: This is not the final score. The e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.