The position of women in society has changed markedly in the last twenty years. Many of the problems young people now experience, such as juvenile delinquency, arise from the fact that many married women now work and are not at home to care for their children. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
In the last twenty years, the position of women in surroundings has altered and made cause of teenagers criminalization has raised. In these paragraphs, I would prefer to disagree because of shift in perception.
Women in Indonesia preferred to stay at home in the past. They should prepare to cook for their husband and children in the morning. Then, they should assist their kids for babysitting while waiting their husband back from work. These activities rolled up day by day and became their responsibilities in their whole life. Meanwhile, those background lives when were child are caused their routines. Previously, women in Indonesia only passed their high education until senior high school. This is because of their parents tough women are not important to achieve high education than men. The future of women are just in household, keep their kids, and being homier. These perceptions made the position of women in past felt hassle to enhance their future.
Nowadays women have same position as men which can reach their education highly. The perception ago has changed because of gendered. Women and men have identical ability to work and enrich their future. I generally agree with this condition and not have correlation with problems of teenagers occasionally. Take one case today, juvenile delinquency is issue of young people problem in society. It generates adolescent being cruiser such chaos, robber, and drug addict. However, these crimes are not match with pose of female who prefer to work and seldom to stay at home. As changes of time, education of children varies today. Both women and men who build household can administer their children in nursery since they were children to receive prime education. Meanwhile, mothers still can maintain their kids after work and gather in the weekend to spend their time by holiday together.
To end, problems of young people can come with or without handling women. For advice, that troubles are caused by less-caring, lack of behavior, and less education. If parents and especially for women can cooperate their time to work and family, I think that are not problems anymore.
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Sentence: In the last twenty years, the position of women in surroundings has altered and made cause of teenagers criminalization has raised.
Description: two verbs in one sentence.
Sentence: In the last twenty years, the position of women in surroundings has altered and made cause of teenagers criminalization has raised.
Error: criminalization Suggestion: No alternate word
Sentence: The future of women are just in household, keep their kids, and being homier.
Error: homier Suggestion: ?
Sentence: The perception ago has changed because of gendered.
Error: gendered Suggestion: No alternate word
flaws:
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.583 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 3.73 7.5
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Attribute Value Ideal
Score: 7.0 out of 9
Category: Good Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 1 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 24 15
No. of Words: 350 350
No. of Characters: 1749 1500
No. of Different Words: 191 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.325 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.997 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.499 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 118 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 86 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 59 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 39 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 14.583 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 3.73 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.167 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.276 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.423 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.052 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5