The authors claims that the decline in deer populations is the result of these deer not being able to follow their migration patterns across the frozen sea. The author's conclusion is based on the premises that these deer live on islands in Canada's arctic region, they go from island to island by moving over ice to find food, and he assumes that this decline is due to global warming that is melting sea ice. There are many flaws in the evidence given by the author as he gave no substantial evidence to support his claims.
First of all, global warming may not be the reason why the numbers of the arctic deer are declining. The scarcity of food can also occur from some successive very cold winters that make it impossible for food to grow on the islands' soil. During these winters, the deer can cross the ice over the ocean as much as they want to go to other islands, but they will ultimately not find food on all of the islands, and thus their numbers may decline because of starvation. Also, even though global warming may cause sea ice to melt, it will create a favorable environment on the islands for the food to grow, and thus food will be available for longer periods than before, providing the deer with the food they need without having to immigrate.
Second, the decline in deer populations may be cause by excessive hunting. Hunters usually tend to hunt some species excessively because of some of their features that they can resell at high price after. And when a large number of hunters starts to compete, it can only have negative consequences on the species they are hunting. We have many examples from across history that supports this, as many historical animal species have come to extinction just after we humans put foot on their natural habitats and started exploiting it intensely.
Not to forget that for the global warming assumption to be true, the author should have gave some extensive data and evidence of its effect on the deer populations, the food abundance, and the sea ice levels in these regions, and show how the data relate to the conclusion. This would have strengthened his argument and gave it more credibility, making it harder for us readers to deny and try to debunk it.
All in all, the author made the conclusion that the decline in deer population is caused by the latters not being able to follow their immigration routes by travelling over the frozen sea ice. He assumed that because this decline coincides with the global warming trend that our planet is currently living, it should be the cause of this numbers decline, without providing any data or evidence to support his claims. His text would have been more convincing if it had some of them to convince us.
- As people rely more and more on technology to solve problems, the ability of humans to think for themselves will surely deteriorate. 70
- 1.Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic regions. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of the year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed and cold enough, 55
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- A nation should require all of its students to study the same national curriculum until they enter college. 50
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Essay evaluation report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 0 2
No. of Sentences: 16 15
No. of Words: 480 350
No. of Characters: 2197 1500
No. of Different Words: 218 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.681 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.577 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.325 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 152 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 102 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 53 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 37 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 30 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 11.576 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.375 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.34 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.589 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.143 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 1, column 13, Rule ID: AGREEMENT_SENT_START[1]
Message: You should probably use 'claim'.
Suggestion: claim
The authors claims that the decline in deer populations is...
^^^^^^
Line 1, column 162, Rule ID: POSSESIVE_APOSTROPHE[1]
Message: Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean 'authors'' or 'author's'?
Suggestion: authors'; author's
...ion patterns across the frozen sea. The authors conclusion is based on the premises tha...
^^^^^^^
Line 1, column 210, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
...conclusion is based on the premises that these deer live on islands in Canadas ar...
^^
Line 3, column 390, Rule ID: ALL_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'all the'.
Suggestion: all the
...t they will ultimately not find food on all of the islands, and thus their numbers may dec...
^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 45, Rule ID: BE_CAUSE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'because'?
Suggestion: because
...nd, the decline in deer populations may be cause by excessive hunting. Hunters usually t...
^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 215, Rule ID: LARGE_NUMBER_OF[1]
Message: Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use 'many' or 'numerous'
Suggestion: many; numerous
...an resell at high price after. And when a large number of hunters starts to compete, it can only ...
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 89, Rule ID: GAVE_GIVE[1]
Message: Did you mean 'give'?
Suggestion: give
...tion to be true, the author should have gave some extensive data and evidence of its...
^^^^
Line 7, column 89, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'given'.
Suggestion: given
...tion to be true, the author should have gave some extensive data and evidence of its...
^^^^
Line 9, column 334, Rule ID: THIS_NNS[1]
Message: Did you mean 'these'?
Suggestion: these
...ently living, it should be the cause of this numbers decline, without providing any ...
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, if, may, second, so, then, thus, first of all
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 17.0 19.6327345309 87% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 16.0 12.9520958084 124% => OK
Conjunction : 12.0 11.1786427146 107% => OK
Relative clauses : 12.0 13.6137724551 88% => OK
Pronoun: 54.0 28.8173652695 187% => Less pronouns wanted
Preposition: 71.0 55.5748502994 128% => OK
Nominalization: 13.0 16.3942115768 79% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2250.0 2260.96107784 100% => OK
No of words: 480.0 441.139720559 109% => OK
Chars per words: 4.6875 5.12650576532 91% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.68069463864 4.56307096286 103% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.38187601133 2.78398813304 86% => OK
Unique words: 223.0 204.123752495 109% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.464583333333 0.468620217663 99% => OK
syllable_count: 707.4 705.55239521 100% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 8.0 4.96107784431 161% => OK
Article: 8.0 8.76447105788 91% => OK
Subordination: 2.0 2.70958083832 74% => OK
Conjunction: 7.0 1.67365269461 418% => Less conjunction wanted as sentence beginning.
Preposition: 2.0 4.22255489022 47% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 16.0 19.7664670659 81% => Need more sentences. Double check the format of sentences, make sure there is a space between two sentences, or have enough periods. And also check the lengths of sentences, maybe they are too long.
Sentence length: 30.0 22.8473053892 131% => The Avg. Sentence Length is relatively long.
Sentence length SD: 65.1354058385 57.8364921388 113% => OK
Chars per sentence: 140.625 119.503703932 118% => OK
Words per sentence: 30.0 23.324526521 129% => OK
Discourse Markers: 3.9375 5.70786347227 69% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 9.0 5.25449101796 171% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 10.0 8.20758483034 122% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 2.0 6.88822355289 29% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.255930806612 0.218282227539 117% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0851853825673 0.0743258471296 115% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0940306820707 0.0701772020484 134% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.143372618475 0.128457276422 112% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0988133275043 0.0628817314937 157% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 15.7 14.3799401198 109% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 49.49 48.3550499002 102% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 13.8 12.197005988 113% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 10.51 12.5979740519 83% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.28 8.32208582834 99% => OK
difficult_words: 96.0 98.500998004 97% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 13.0 12.3882235529 105% => OK
gunning_fog: 14.0 11.1389221557 126% => OK
text_standard: 14.0 11.9071856287 118% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.