The following appeared in the City Council Proceedings section of the local newspaper in Smithville. “The city council of Smithville has recommended making changes to police procedures to improve the visibility of the police force. These changes include hiring more police officers, budgeting more funds for police overtime, and directing officers to patrol significantly more often on foot rather than from their patrol cars. These improvements in visibility would significantly lower the crime rate in Smithville and make its citizens feel safer.”
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether there commendation is likely to have the predicted result. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.
The council concludes that in order to reduce the crime rate in Smithville, changes should be made to the police procedure in order to improve the visibility of the police force. While this argument may seem logical at first glance, the council rely on unsupported assumptions that are fundamentally flawed and unconvincing. There are questions that remain unanswered; Is there any direct relationship between the police and the crime rate? Is the police truly lacking enough funds?
First, the council assume that the low visibility of the police is the reason for the crime rate in Smithville. The crime rate might be that high for a number of reasons. Suppose for example, the crime rate is as a result of high unemployment rate and this has resulted into residents stealing and harming one another. Definitely, changing the police procedure would have no effect on this as the main issue will still be left unattended to. Furthermore, has this method proved effective for another city which had this exact problem and was provided the same solution? There’s no proof that changing the police procedures would be able to tackle the issue at hand.
Also, it was assumed that recruiting more police officers into the force would reduce the crime mate. The council has not established any direct link between the number of current police officers and how it affects the crime rate. The council provides no evidence on how the police officers they have do not have effect on the crime rate. Suppose the city is too big or the population of the people has really increased hence the need for more police officers, that would have made the argument valid. But the author did not establish any connection between the population and the people. Furthermore, the issue of this crime rate could be as a result of some deficiencies on the part of the police force which is not even gaining attention. It could be as a result of insufficient arms, gadgets and equipment provided, or even the leadership. Definitely if more police officers are employed then the main issue would still remain unresolved.
Additionally, the council assumes that budgeting more funds for the police would also help in addressing this crime issue. There is no information on how the previous funds have been spent. In a situation where the previous funds have been repeatedly embezzled by the officials, then, there is no assurance that the additional funds won’t be mismanaged.
The writer needs to establish a direct connection between the crime rate and the police force; and how these improvements suggested are very relevant to the issue at hand. The argument is deeply flawed and a number of questions which are very crucial to this argument are still unanswered.
| Post date | Users | Rates | Link to Content |
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| 2023-05-26 | Mateo Chen | 58 | view |
| 2023-05-26 | Mateo Chen | 70 | view |
| 2022-08-27 | thelmascakess | 60 | view |
| 2021-11-21 | Lavanyal | 67 | view |
| 2021-07-06 | Sommy | 66 | view |
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Comments
e-rater score report
Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.5 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 6 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 3 2
No. of Sentences: 23 15
No. of Words: 461 350
No. of Characters: 2239 1500
No. of Different Words: 187 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.634 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.857 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.546 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 151 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 105 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 75 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 53 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 20.043 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 5.96 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.609 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.344 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.484 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.118 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 4 5
Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 4, column 302, Rule ID: HAVE_PART_AGREEMENT[1]
Message: Use past participle here: 'done'.
Suggestion: done
...ce on how the police officers they have do not have effect on the crime rate. Supp...
^^
Line 8, column 291, Rule ID: WHITESPACE_RULE
Message: Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
Suggestion:
... to this argument are still unanswered.
^^^^
Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, but, first, furthermore, hence, if, may, really, so, still, then, while, for example, as a result
Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments
Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 26.0 19.6327345309 132% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 13.0 12.9520958084 100% => OK
Conjunction : 14.0 11.1786427146 125% => OK
Relative clauses : 14.0 13.6137724551 103% => OK
Pronoun: 23.0 28.8173652695 80% => OK
Preposition: 41.0 55.5748502994 74% => OK
Nominalization: 16.0 16.3942115768 98% => OK
Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2296.0 2260.96107784 102% => OK
No of words: 460.0 441.139720559 104% => OK
Chars per words: 4.99130434783 5.12650576532 97% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.6311565067 4.56307096286 101% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.63963536463 2.78398813304 95% => OK
Unique words: 198.0 204.123752495 97% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.430434782609 0.468620217663 92% => More unique words wanted or less content wanted.
syllable_count: 740.7 705.55239521 105% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.6 1.59920159681 100% => OK
A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 3.0 4.96107784431 60% => OK
Article: 11.0 8.76447105788 126% => OK
Subordination: 1.0 2.70958083832 37% => OK
Conjunction: 3.0 1.67365269461 179% => OK
Preposition: 1.0 4.22255489022 24% => More preposition wanted as sentence beginning.
Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 23.0 19.7664670659 116% => OK
Sentence length: 20.0 22.8473053892 88% => OK
Sentence length SD: 35.1076658888 57.8364921388 61% => OK
Chars per sentence: 99.8260869565 119.503703932 84% => OK
Words per sentence: 20.0 23.324526521 86% => OK
Discourse Markers: 4.47826086957 5.70786347227 78% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 2.0 5.25449101796 38% => OK
Sentences with positive sentiment : 7.0 8.20758483034 85% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 14.0 6.88822355289 203% => Less negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 2.0 4.67664670659 43% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?
Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.194906606662 0.218282227539 89% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0670745612401 0.0743258471296 90% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0611053064916 0.0701772020484 87% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.121132746601 0.128457276422 94% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0613479714571 0.0628817314937 98% => OK
Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 12.1 14.3799401198 84% => Automated_readability_index is low.
flesch_reading_ease: 51.18 48.3550499002 106% => OK
smog_index: 8.8 7.1628742515 123% => OK
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.1 12.197005988 91% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.66 12.5979740519 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 7.82 8.32208582834 94% => OK
difficult_words: 93.0 98.500998004 94% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 8.5 12.3882235529 69% => OK
gunning_fog: 10.0 11.1389221557 90% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?
---------------------
Rates: 50.0 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 3.0 Out of 6
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Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.