The following appeared in a magazine article about planning for retirement."Clearview should be a top choice for anyone seeking a place to retire, because it has spectacular natural beauty and a consistent climate. Another advantage is that housing costs

According to the article, the author strongly recommends people retired to live in Clearview, for the reason that the housing cost is declining and the taxes are lower than neighbor town. The mayor promises lots of infrastrcutre will be built and the most attractive incident is the health care will be excellent when they grow older. There are some loopholes in this article and we should evaluate them carefully.

To begin with, I belive the ages of the retired people are different. Compared with the promises of the mayor and the excllent healthcare in the future, maybe some of the retirees age at 80 or 90 would not wait for that day.Maybe these old need more doctors and nurses right now instead of in the future.Sorry for saying so while it is true. Thus this future plans would not be attractive for all the retirees.

In additon, let's talk about the cost. Given the housing costs have fallen significantly during the past year, we can not predict what it will be in the future as the price is fluctuating all the time. On the other hand, here is a problem maybe some of the reirees has found that why the costs was declining drastically is in question which may preclude some people retired to reconsider this pace for living. Thus the house costs declining maybe backfire.Even if there is no problem with this decreasing, as more people living in the place, the housing cost will inevitably increase at that time, hence the cost would not a point which the authot thought to attract the retirees.What's more, the taxs remain lower thatn neigboring towns while without specific numbers, ,thus there is another point obsecure to us which could not attract the people retired.

Finally, promises and predictions are not precise and attractive to the people. The mayor promise there will be new schools, streets as well as public services whichi sounds like the speech he won the election.While, firstly ,the mayor does not tell us when and where these infrastructures will be complete.Secondly, new schools maybe unnecessary for retirees.More over, here come the prediction that there will be excellent health care as the retirees grow older,given that the number of phsicians in the place is far greater than national average. While the number of physicians show no evidence to the better health care. We do not know whether these physicians are still working or they are also retired. Besides this, health care for the old is an exhaustive field which the physicians only are far from enough. Nurses and other doctors even dentists are also required. Thus this prediction of excellent health care is not compelling.

In conclusion, this articile for advertising of Clearview is not well suppoted by the evidence. To make the recommendation stronger, the author should show us what condition the place is and get rid of our question that why the housing cost is declining significantly. What more, he should find real persuasive evidence to show the excellent health care both presently and in the future which the old concerns most.

Votes
Average: 4.2 (3 votes)
Essay Categories
Essays by the user:

Grammar and spelling errors:
Line 3, column 160, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...xcllent healthcare in the future, maybe some of the retirees age at 80 or 90 would not wait...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 3, column 225, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Maybe
...at 80 or 90 would not wait for that day.Maybe these old need more doctors and nurses ...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 305, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Sorry
...rses right now instead of in the future.Sorry for saying so while it is true. Thus th...
^^^^^
Line 3, column 343, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...e.Sorry for saying so while it is true. Thus this future plans would not be attracti...
^^^^
Line 5, column 245, Rule ID: SOME_OF_THE[1]
Message: Simply use 'some'.
Suggestion: some
...the other hand, here is a problem maybe some of the reirees has found that why the costs wa...
^^^^^^^^^^^
Line 5, column 410, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...red to reconsider this pace for living. Thus the house costs declining maybe backfir...
^^^^
Line 5, column 456, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Even
...he house costs declining maybe backfire.Even if there is no problem with this decrea...
^^^^
Line 5, column 680, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Whats
... authot thought to attract the retirees.Whats more, the taxs remain lower thatn neigb...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 680, Rule ID: EN_CONTRACTION_SPELLING
Message: Possible spelling mistake found
Suggestion: What's
... authot thought to attract the retirees.Whats more, the taxs remain lower thatn neigb...
^^^^^
Line 5, column 768, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...ng towns while without specific numbers, ,thus there is another point obsecure to ...
^^
Line 7, column 211, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: While
...nds like the speech he won the election.While, firstly ,the mayor does not tell us wh...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 225, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma, but not before the comma
Suggestion: ,
...peech he won the election.While, firstly ,the mayor does not tell us when and wher...
^^
Line 7, column 308, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: Secondly
... these infrastructures will be complete.Secondly, new schools maybe unnecessary for reti...
^^^^^^^^
Line 7, column 361, Rule ID: SENTENCE_WHITESPACE
Message: Add a space between sentences
Suggestion: More
... schools maybe unnecessary for retirees.More over, here come the prediction that the...
^^^^
Line 7, column 464, Rule ID: COMMA_PARENTHESIS_WHITESPACE
Message: Put a space after the comma
Suggestion: , given
...t health care as the retirees grow older,given that the number of phsicians in the pla...
^^^^^^
Line 7, column 551, Rule ID: SENTENCE_FRAGMENT[1]
Message: “While” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
...e is far greater than national average. While the number of physicians show no eviden...
^^^^^
Line 7, column 876, Rule ID: SENT_START_CONJUNCTIVE_LINKING_ADVERB_COMMA[1]
Message: Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Suggestion: Thus,
...octors even dentists are also required. Thus this prediction of excellent health car...
^^^^

Transition Words or Phrases used:
also, besides, finally, first, firstly, hence, if, may, second, secondly, so, still, thus, well, while, in conclusion, as well as, it is true, to begin with, on the other hand

Attributes: Values AverageValues Percentages(Values/AverageValues)% => Comments

Performance on Part of Speech:
To be verbs : 30.0 19.6327345309 153% => OK
Auxiliary verbs: 17.0 12.9520958084 131% => OK
Conjunction : 13.0 11.1786427146 116% => OK
Relative clauses : 15.0 13.6137724551 110% => OK
Pronoun: 32.0 28.8173652695 111% => OK
Preposition: 47.0 55.5748502994 85% => OK
Nominalization: 10.0 16.3942115768 61% => OK

Performance on vocabulary words:
No of characters: 2542.0 2260.96107784 112% => OK
No of words: 514.0 441.139720559 117% => OK
Chars per words: 4.94552529183 5.12650576532 96% => OK
Fourth root words length: 4.76146701107 4.56307096286 104% => OK
Word Length SD: 2.71108233892 2.78398813304 97% => OK
Unique words: 250.0 204.123752495 122% => OK
Unique words percentage: 0.486381322957 0.468620217663 104% => OK
syllable_count: 770.4 705.55239521 109% => OK
avg_syllables_per_word: 1.5 1.59920159681 94% => OK

A sentence (or a clause, phrase) starts by:
Pronoun: 5.0 4.96107784431 101% => OK
Article: 7.0 8.76447105788 80% => OK
Subordination: 3.0 2.70958083832 111% => OK
Conjunction: 0.0 1.67365269461 0% => OK
Preposition: 7.0 4.22255489022 166% => OK

Performance on sentences:
How many sentences: 20.0 19.7664670659 101% => OK
Sentence length: 25.0 22.8473053892 109% => OK
Sentence length SD: 117.600977887 57.8364921388 203% => The lengths of sentences changed so frequently.
Chars per sentence: 127.1 119.503703932 106% => OK
Words per sentence: 25.7 23.324526521 110% => OK
Discourse Markers: 8.75 5.70786347227 153% => OK
Paragraphs: 5.0 5.15768463074 97% => OK
Language errors: 17.0 5.25449101796 324% => Less language errors wanted.
Sentences with positive sentiment : 13.0 8.20758483034 158% => OK
Sentences with negative sentiment : 3.0 6.88822355289 44% => More negative sentences wanted.
Sentences with neutral sentiment: 4.0 4.67664670659 86% => OK
What are sentences with positive/Negative/neutral sentiment?

Coherence and Cohesion:
Essay topic to essay body coherence: 0.17157781195 0.218282227539 79% => OK
Sentence topic coherence: 0.0532976917451 0.0743258471296 72% => OK
Sentence topic coherence SD: 0.0423246082821 0.0701772020484 60% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence: 0.108107283924 0.128457276422 84% => OK
Paragraph topic coherence SD: 0.0227305116914 0.0628817314937 36% => Paragraphs are similar to each other. Some content may get duplicated or it is not exactly right on the topic.

Essay readability:
automated_readability_index: 14.7 14.3799401198 102% => OK
flesch_reading_ease: 54.56 48.3550499002 113% => OK
smog_index: 3.1 7.1628742515 43% => Smog_index is low.
flesch_kincaid_grade: 11.9 12.197005988 98% => OK
coleman_liau_index: 11.73 12.5979740519 93% => OK
dale_chall_readability_score: 8.01 8.32208582834 96% => OK
difficult_words: 102.0 98.500998004 104% => OK
linsear_write_formula: 9.0 12.3882235529 73% => OK
gunning_fog: 12.0 11.1389221557 108% => OK
text_standard: 12.0 11.9071856287 101% => OK
What are above readability scores?

---------------------

Rates: 66.67 out of 100
Scores by essay e-grader: 4.0 Out of 6
---------------------
Note: the e-grader does NOT examine the meaning of words and ideas. VIP users will receive further evaluations by advanced module of e-grader and human graders.

Sentence: The mayor promises lots of infrastrcutre will be built and the most attractive incident is the health care will be excellent when they grow older.
Error: infrastrcutre Suggestion: infrastructure

Sentence: To begin with, I belive the ages of the retired people are different.
Error: belive Suggestion: believe

Sentence: Compared with the promises of the mayor and the excllent healthcare in the future, maybe some of the retirees age at 80 or 90 would not wait for that day.Maybe these old need more doctors and nurses right now instead of in the future.Sorry for saying so while it is true.
Error: excllent Suggestion: excellent
Error: healthcare Suggestion: health care

Sentence: In additon, let's talk about the cost.
Error: additon Suggestion: addition

Sentence: On the other hand, here is a problem maybe some of the reirees has found that why the costs was declining drastically is in question which may preclude some people retired to reconsider this pace for living.
Error: may Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: reirees Suggestion: retries

Sentence: Thus the house costs declining maybe backfire.Even if there is no problem with this decreasing, as more people living in the place, the housing cost will inevitably increase at that time, hence the cost would not a point which the authot thought to attract the retirees.What's more, the taxs remain lower thatn neigboring towns while without specific numbers, ,thus there is another point obsecure to us which could not attract the people retired.
Error: obsecure Suggestion: obscure
Error: backfire Suggestion: No alternate word
Error: authot Suggestion: author
Error: thatn Suggestion: than
Error: neigboring Suggestion: neighboring

Sentence: The mayor promise there will be new schools, streets as well as public services whichi sounds like the speech he won the election.While, firstly ,the mayor does not tell us when and where these infrastructures will be complete.Secondly, new schools maybe unnecessary for retirees.More over, here come the prediction that there will be excellent health care as the retirees grow older,given that the number of phsicians in the place is far greater than national average.
Error: whichi Suggestion: which
Error: phsicians Suggestion: physicians

Sentence: In conclusion, this articile for advertising of Clearview is not well suppoted by the evidence.
Error: suppoted Suggestion: supposed
Error: articile Suggestion: article

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Attribute Value Ideal
Final score: 3.0 out of 6
Category: Satisfactory Excellent
No. of Grammatical Errors: 0 2
No. of Spelling Errors: 16 2
No. of Sentences: 20 15
No. of Words: 522 350
No. of Characters: 2475 1500
No. of Different Words: 242 200
Fourth Root of Number of Words: 4.78 4.7
Average Word Length: 4.741 4.6
Word Length SD: 2.432 2.4
No. of Words greater than 5 chars: 159 100
No. of Words greater than 6 chars: 117 80
No. of Words greater than 7 chars: 80 40
No. of Words greater than 8 chars: 45 20
Use of Passive Voice (%): 0 0
Avg. Sentence Length: 26.1 21.0
Sentence Length SD: 20.258 7.5
Use of Discourse Markers (%): 0.65 0.12
Sentence-Text Coherence: 0.285 0.35
Sentence-Para Coherence: 0.504 0.50
Sentence-Sentence Coherence: 0.118 0.07
Number of Paragraphs: 5 5